Another Country Jokes

2/10, definitely not worth the trip to Poland.

She wanted to go to either Canada or Iran.

Canada, Canada's pretty close, I just ran Canada in about 2 minutes; I found a way that fit our budget.

And Iran, Iran's so far away, I just ran Iran all night and day; I couldn't get a way.

You get there.

I love you refrigerator!

An ill-eagle.

He saw a man driving down the road with a big van and so he shouted after him,

"I'll give you €50 to bring these monkeys to the zoo for me"

The man with the van agreed and left with the monkeys in his van.

A couple of hours go by and while he is on his way to the airport, he see... read more

Abroad.

...I thought customs was gonna Caeser salad, but they let it romaine.

I said "Yemen, sounds good"

A heart attack

The Pope was leaving for a trip to another country and a limo arrived by his residence to take him to the airport. Always wanting to, but never having a chance to drive a limousine, the Pope asked the driver if he'd let him drive this time. The driver was taken aback at first, but agreed. The Pop... read more

A man lives in a foreign country, and his job is to operate the train that connects one town to another. He is not very good at his job, and he is also very greedy. Since his income does not meet his expenses, he decides to steal from his passengers' fares. At first he steals only a little. However,... read more

1. "Partial mobilization" is when you are drafted in whole, and returned back in parts.

2. "Dad, why are we hauled off to the trenches?" "I don't know, son, I'm not into politics."

3. For a long time, the government told us, "if you don't like Russia, go to another country." Now they t... read more

An American student was studying Russian government.

Hoping to understand another country’s government in familiar terms, he asked his teacher, “Is the Kremlin more like the White House, the Capitol, the Pentagon, or the Supreme Court?”

The teacher replied, “Yes.”

**China has never ‘oppressed’ another country and never will, Xi says**

Tomato in another country.

The bartender tells says they don't serve minors as all they have are hard liquors. The child says he wants two whiskies then a malt. The bartender says that he needs to see ID. The child shows an ID from another country, claiming he is 95 years old. The bartender gives the child the ID back and ask... read more

Because if they had a holiday each time they invaded another country, killed the locals and exploited the people, they’d never have to go to work again.

The Wall Street Journal - Read by people who run the country.
The Washington Post - Read by people who THINK they run the country.
The New York Times - Read by people who think they SHOULD be running the country.
The Boston Globe - Read by people whose parents used to run the country, and ... read more

He calls his son and says he wanted to tell him something for a long time.

Son Ant : What is it dad?

Father Ant : I cannot say that in this god forbidden country we have to move immediately to France or Italy before i am dead.

Confused,the Son Ant made arrangements to move to Fr... read more

He sees the woman on reception and enquires about joining the club.

Looking slightly disappoint, the woman at the desk tells Lewis that unfortunately the club has a very old rule which states only white people can become members.

She apologises for the out of date rule but says that ... read more

George and John are talking and George says he is leaving for another country to work.

''The only only thing i ask from you is to take care my cat and my mother'' he says.

Two months go by and John calls George and says '' your cat is dead''

George is shocked and tells John ''... read more

She arrives at LAX early in the morning and arranges to drive to his house, in New Orleans, in order to “take in the scenery” and see what the American South has to offer.

She drives at a leisurely pace, and stops at scenic viewpoints whenever possible, knowing she has some time to get to he... read more

"I think those people in the car next to us are from another country"
"why is that?" I said
"Well, the kids are writing on the window and it says, 'stit rey su wohs'"

The town manufacturer moved their operations to another country, to pay lower wages. The people who worked in the town, lost their jobs and were suddenly thrust into poverty.

An entrepreneur heard about this situation. Joseph P Klanta was operating several manufacturing operations. His s... read more

The Soviets sent the first Soviet to Space and returned him safely to the Earth. In response, the Americans sent the American to the moon, landed him there and returned him safely. Another country contended, the Philippines in secret to the public was in preparation of a space program, to send the f... read more

1) Yo Momma So Fat The Only Letters She Knows In The Alphabet Are K.F.C!
2) Yo mamma so ugly even Bob the Builder said, "We cant fix it."
3) Yo Mamma So Fat, Dora Can't Explore Her.
4) Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
5) Yo mamma so fat... read more

In 2019, the army had been at war with another country. In order to keep their troops healthy, they needed to monitor the submarine that carried supplies to where the others were located.

But there was a small problem. Every so often, there would be a defect in the submarine's engine that wou... read more