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Willpower Jokes

Willpower can make you rich..

..if you get in the right person's will.

Willpower

I'd just come out of the shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn, & a jumbo sausage. A poor, homeless man sat there and said 'I haven't eaten for two days.'

I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was offered sex with a 21 yr old today

In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I've decided to stop masturbating as a test of willpower for the next 30 days.

Starting tomorrow.

People often tell me I have no willpower or self-control

Rubbish I say. I've quit smoking loads of times

Alcoholic, women lover and weed smoker go to hell

The Satan says them: "you can get out if you'll spend 100 years in a room with your main addictions".

He shows the alcoholic a room with lots of alcohol. Alcoholic says: "ok, i'll spend 100 years here".

Then he shows a women lover a room with beautiful young women.
He says "ok, i'll...

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Trouble asking a girl out

So there's this kid, let's call him Jerry. He's been eyeing this girl at school for months now, and there's a big dance coming up. He knows she doesn't have a date, and he would give anything to go with her- but there's a problem. Whenever he gets close to her, he gets an erection that would rival t...

As an experience it had highs and lows.

My bloodpressure and willpower respectively.

I never believed the saying that soreness after a workout is weakness leaving the body

My willpower is still there

A tragedy in the Mystic town

The Mystic town is populated by the human powers, who oddly look like big canisters with labels on them, and is divided into two parts by a huge road. One side of the road is for "General Powers", where guys like Strength, Speed and Agility live. The other one is "Other's" half, where Karma, Qi, Wil...

How did the farmer deal with the stubborn sheep's wool?

With shear willpower

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3 guys in Heaven

3 guys get into Heaven. An angel greets them.
"Welcome to Heaven. You can have anything you want in here EXCEPT for your #1 indulgence when you were living on Earth. We may test your willpower so be careful."

The first guy was a huge classic car collector.
The second guy was ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young couple wanted to join a church.

The reverend told them, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from sex for one whole month."

The couple agreed and after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church. When the Pastor ushers them into his office, the wife is crying and the husband obviously ver...

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