UPJOKE
tenacityperseverancedeterminationdurabilityingenuitydoggednesstenaciousnessperseverationcontinuitypersistencypertinacitycontinuouscontinuationcontinuancestamina

I used to suffer from depression but through hard work, persistence, and never giving up

I now suffer from anxiety and depression

After months of patience and persistence I finally have a nice body.

It fits perfectly in my trunk.

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Two women were playing golf

One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man, and i...

Did you hear about the sheep that climbed over the mountain instead of around it?

He took the path of fleece persistence.

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What is persistence?

Fucking a dead woman until she comes.

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This guy was cruising along a deserted Texas highway on his way to work..

doing 92 mph in an 85 zone. As he crests a slight hill he gets nailed by a highway patrolman running radar. Easing over onto the shoulder and coming to a stop, the officer walks up to the car and asks "License and registration please, and where the hell are you going in such a hurry?"

The...

Mt. Rushmore wasn't built in a day.

A girl recently told me that she was impressed with my persistence. I replied with, "Mt. Rushmore wasn't built in a day. I'll chip away until you have something disappointing and smaller than imagined."

Little Timmy is playing with a shape sorter.

After multiple attempts, Timmy starts getting frustrated while trying to fit a square block into an oval hole.

Timmy's father watches the sheer persistence of his son with a sort of wonder until Timmy screams,

"HOW DOES THIS A SQUARE FIT IN AN OVAL?!?"

Timmy's father, wishing to...

My dad tells this joke all the time. kind of long. enjoy

One day a young man with no arms walked into a church and told the pastor that he always wanted to be a bell ringer. The pastor looked at him and said, “my son, you have no arms to pull the rope and the bell tower is very high.” The young man pleaded with the pastor to give him a chance. Finally the...

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[NSFW] What's the difference between a sex doll and a store mannequin?

Persistence.

When Dr. Samuel Johnson had finished his first English dictionary, he was visited by a delegation of "London's Respectable Womanhood" who came to his parlor at Fleet St. and said, "Doctor, we congratulate you on your decision to exclude all indecent words from your dictionary." And he said...

"Ladies, I congratulate you on your persistence in looking them up."

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Once upon a time...

A man was driving through a rural countryside when his car got a flat. The only building within miles was a monestary. He walked up the steps, knocked on the huge wooden doors, and explained his situation to the monks. The monks were more than helpful. They sent a message to the nearest road station...

Back when I was in high school, I worked at a grocery store as a stockboy.

One of the "long time fixtures" there was a homeless guy who would sit outside and ask for change. He was there every day, from opening of the store until closing, without fail.

Several months after I started, the owner decided to go in a new direction with the store and wanted to increase wo...

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