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Streamlined Jokes

I wanted to help my pet snail.

He was really slow like, so one day I took off his shell, thought it'd make him more streamlined. Turns out it didn't. It made him more sluggish.

Engineering students are always confused by women...

....why do the ones with the most streamlined bodies put up the most resistance?

In Celebration of my Cake Day, here's a terrible joke: the Olympic Swimmer and his Son

Michael was a famous Olympic Swimmer. Recently retired, it was his dream to continue his legacy by teaching his son the art of swimming. They had practiced for years, and when Michael's son was ready, he was entered into his first ever tournament.

The first round was easy. After all, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman contacts her brother-in-law last minute to ask him to watch her daughter for the day...

The brother-in-law, Tim, grudgingly agrees. He picks the girl up and takes her down to the shoreline where he works.

"Do you know what I do for a living?"

She nods. "You're a fisherman, right?"

"Well, kind of. See, we get a lot of fish around here, and in order to catch as ma...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So Satan asks God to let him back into Heaven...

God says "Satan, you've betrayed me before, but I am a just and forgiving god. You may get back into Heaven, if you can beat my only son in a programming contest."

Satan and Jesus meet to agree to the terms. The contest is a simple one. God will set a timer for six hours, and both Jesus and S...

Three guys arrive at the pearly gates...

St. Peter says "OK, we've kind of streamlined the entry process here. I'm going to ask you a single question, and if you answer it correctly you will be admitted into heaven." He turns to the first guy and says "What is Easter?" The guy says "Easter, huh? Let me see... Isn't there a tree involved? S...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Restaurant got Business Consultation

A client ordered a soup in a restaurant but he didn't get his spoon so he calls the waiter over. The waiter just grabs in his breast pocket and pulls out a spoon and hands it to the customer. The customer is pleasantly surprised and goes "that sure went quick, you guys always carry an extra spoon ar...

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