How did i know for sure global warming was real?

On the day Trump got elected over 50 million snowflakes melted at once.

People are like snowflakes.

They are all unique and if to many are piled up on the road it’s hard to drive.

Republicans are the true snowflakes...

they're white, they're cold, and if you put enough of em together they'll shut down public schools

EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry!

its a joke folks. just a joke.

Enter password: ‘snowflake’

Confirm password: ‘snowflake’

Error, your passwords are not alike

Snowflakes are actually the perfect metaphor for people.

Each one is unique, but we all have the same structure and are pretty similar in spite of our differences. And really, with as many around as there is, no one is going to notice your differences unless they care enough to look closely.

Also, people are similar to snowflakes in that it is diff...

Vaginas are like snowflakes

While they all appear to look the same, each of them has a subtle difference – making them all uniquely beautiful

Also, it’s fun to catch them on your tongue.

Humans are just like snowflakes. Each one is unique in its own way

And a large amount of them on my windshield makes it harder to drive.

Dear liberals, stop crying about being called a snowflake.

In 20 years, nobody will remember what snowflakes are anyway.

Once upon a time, there was a happy family with 3 kids: Snowflake, Sandgrain, and Brick

One day, Snowflake went up to his mother and asked:

“Mommy! Why is my name Snowflake?”

“Well you see, when you were born, a little snowflake landed on your head. So we decided to name you after it.” She replied.

A couple days later, Sandgrain went up to his mother and asked:
...

If you complain that this generation is a bunch of snowflakes...

Don't worry, soon there won't be snowflakes anywhere.

Friends are like snowflakes:

When you pee on them, they disappear

Never catch snowflakes on your tongue

until all the birds have gone south for the winter!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Maria had 3 children, snowflake, sand, and brick.

One day snowflake goes to her mom and asks her: Mom, why am I called snowflake? Then the mother replies: Because when you were born, a snowflake fell on your head. The next day goes Sand and asks: Mom, why am I called Sand? And the mother replies: Because when you were born, a small grain of sand f...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] Vaginas are like snowflakes

It doesn't snow where I live.

As a millennial snowflake, if I can't win,

I at least expect a ribbon for precipitation.

You can’t really blame Donald Trump for not believing in Global Warming

He’s permanently surrounded by snowflakes.

Three kids named Raindrop, Snowflake and Brick are in school on the first day.

Three kids named Raindrop, Snowflake and Brick are in school on the first day. The teacher asks Raindrop "Why is your name Raindrop?"

"Because when I was born, a raindrop fell on my head."

Then she asks Snowflake "Why is your name Snowflake?"

"Because when I was born, a snowflak...

"The child returned to the sun"

Around 1250, a merchant leaves France for a 2 years trip to the middle-east. When he comes back, his unfaithful wife had a son with a handsome young man of the city. Upon coming back home, the merchant sees the baby, who is obviously too young to be his own. He asks his wife: "My dear wife, please t...

Women are like snowflakes

Every one I touch suddenly disappears without a trace

Why doesn't Santa have any millennial elves?

Because there are already enough snowflakes at the North Pole.

How do you melt a snowflake?

Take a knee

If someone calls me a snowflake one more time...

I’m going to melt down.

Easily offended people are literally like snowflakes.

Alone, they are harmless. Together, however, they ruin everything good and bad in their way.

What is a snowflake's school grade based on?

Class precipitation.

My girlfriend is a special snowflake

She's cold and flaky.

Why is Blizzard so quick to resort to censorship?

Because they're nothing more than a bunch of snowflakes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Shut Up

A young bluebird was flying from tree to tree in the brisk autumn air when he heard his parents call. Upon arriving back to the nest they tell the young avian to prepare for the trip south.

The little bluebird stubbornly inquires why, to which papa bluebird replies with details of heavy and c...

Why was the young snowflake so upset?

Because he just watched his mom get plowed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

American society is best summarized by Christmas time

People who buy a bunch of shit while being surrounded by snowflakes.

Every president has a secret service codename.

The current president is “Mogul”. I looked it up.
Mogul: a member of the Muslim dynasty of Mongol origin
Nope, that can’t be it, unless he’s a total self-hater. Try alternate definition:
Mogul: In downhill skiing, an ice-cold lump; an extremely dense obstacle to human progress, a destabil...

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Snowflakes.

Credit: my friend's 3-year-old made this up. I'll pass on any karma to his college fund.

After the blizzard yesterday I think I understand Republicans a little better

Because these snowflakes are killing me

Why doesn’t Ben Shapiro like winter time?

Because of the snowflakes

A child asks why their name is...

A mother and father are going through baby photos with their three children when the first child looks up to his mother and asks...

"Momma, why did you call me Sand?"

And the mother replies, "Well, we named you Sand because when you were born a grain of sand landed on your forehead"...

It is December in Ontario...

... and the only Snowflakes I can find are on Facebook.

Why don't conservatives believe in global warming?

Because of all the snowflakes.

Why do a lot of old people move to Florida?

Because they hate liberal snowflakes.

A boy wants to ask a girl to prom, and he really likes her so he goes all out...

He goes to the florist to buy some flowers, but the line is out the door. He thinks, "that's okay, she's worth it," and waits an hour in the flower line.

Next he goes to the candy store to get some really nice chocolates and again, the line is absurdly long. Again he thinks, "that's okay, I'...

I hate when a generation refuses to work and still expect to receive government checks

Those baby boomers in Congress sure are entitled snowflakes

I know the shutdown is done, but I think this joke is funny and I made it up myself.

Why are conservatives climate change deniers?

Because they want to melt the snowflakes!

I'm surprised there aren't more far-righters who acknowledge global warming

I heard it means there'll be fewer snowflakes around.

Snowman puns to celebrate the snowstorm in my area

What do vampires get when they bite snowmen?
"Frostbite"

What is a snowman's favorite cereal?
"Snowflakes"

Why didn't the snowman answer the question?
"He didn't snow the answer"

What does a snowman like to ride?
"An icicle"

How can you tell a snowman is angry...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

That was a hell of a XXX storm last light.

All you could see were snowflakes getting blown!

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.