UPJOKE
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What do you call a chicken on rollerblades?

Poultry in motion.

Sorry, just thought of that. And...
I will not think anymore.

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Rollerblades

What's the hardest part of roller blading?

Telling your father you're gay.

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What do you call a nice ass on rollerblades?

Meals on wheels.

Three men ascend to heaven and they meet St Peter at the pearly gates.



St. Peter makes it clear to the men that they can only come in if they’ve never drunk, never smoked and never been unfaithful to their wife. The first man steps up and says: “Hiya Pete, I’ve never smoked, never drunk and never been unfaithful to my wife.”

The first man gets the nod o...

3 men make it to heaven.

man 1, man 2, and man3.

An angel tells them: "The vehicle that you get to travel with in heaven will depend on the number of times you cheated on your partner"

So the angel asks the man 1, and man 1 says that he cheated on his wife 5 times. The angel checks to see if he is lying, and i...

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Emergency supplies.

Three friends decide to go on a luxury cruise around the world. On the third night, the ship suffer's catastrophic damage in a storm and begins to sink. The three jump overboard and cling to debris to stay afloat. The next morning, they awake to find themselves washed up on a nearby small island. Th...

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3 men trying to get into heaven

The first guy goes up to St Peter.
"Peter can I get into heaven?"
He replies
"Have you been faithful to your wife?"
He says "yes yes of course! Every day of my life loved her til I died never looked at another woman once!"
St Peter says "that's great just what I wanted to hear. Here...

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Three angels are given gifts from god based on their loyalty and appreciation towards their spouses.

The first angel confesses that he often cheats on his wife and believes she would be better off....to be the equivalent of dead in heaven.

The second angel admits that his wife can be a bitch sometimes but still is willing to stick with her for eternity. Provided she stays in shape of course....

Three men are waiting at the gates to heaven

When they are told they will receive a better car, the more loyal they were to their wives.

The first man approaches St. Peter and St. Peter says "you sir were very loyal to your wife you get a Lamborghini" the man thanks St. Peter, gets in his car and drives through the gates.

The sec...

Blacks the best colour to wear to a funeral isn't it?

Just thinking which rollerblades to wear.

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