Red Head Jokes - 68 Hilarious Red Head Jokes

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-headed mother are talking about their daughters.

The brunette tells them, "I found cigarettes in my daughter's room, I can't believe she smokes! "

The red head said, "I know, I found some beer in my daughter's room. I couldn't believe it! "

The blonde says "That's nothing! I found condoms in my daughter's room. I never knew she had a...

A blonde, a brunette and a red head go hunting....

A blonde, a brunette and a red head go hunting....

The first day, they set up camp and the brunette goes out on her own. Later that afternoon, she returns with a deer in tow! "Wow," said the blonde, "How did you find that?!"

"It's easy," said the brunette, "I just followed the tracks!"...

What do you call a red headed ninja?

A Ginja

A Blonde, a Brunette, and A Red Head are sentenced to death.

They are lined up in the yard to be killed. The main guard went up to the Brunette. “You have a choice on how you would like to die: by electric chair, firing squad, or hanging. Which will it be?”

The Brunette replied, “I’ll take the electric chair.”

She was led away by two other guar...

I went on a date with a red head once.

It was going smoothly and we talked for a long while over some beers. She kept spinning her hair around her finger and looked at me smiling. I took it as a good sign but turns out it was just a red hair ring.

So three women escape from a prison, a blonde, a brunette, and a red head.

They hide under a tarp on a work truck. The security guard is checking the tarp at the gate. He pokes his rifle at the brunette and she goes "meow, meow". He pokes his rifle at the red head and she goes "woof, woof". He pokes his rifle at the blonde and she goes "potato, potato".

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are driving in a truck.

On one cold icy day a blonde, brunette and a red head decide to take a drive.

The brunette as the best driver in icy conditions decides to drive. The red head decides to ride passenger because she keeps the best eye out. The blonde decides to ride in the bed of the truck because she’s dress...

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar...

All three are shitty at limbo.

Why are natural red heads so rare?

Because god is a bad cook

What's it called when a red head snorts a line of coke?

A ginger rail.

What do you call a red head with a yeast infection

A ginger bread house

A blonde, a brunette and a red head rob a bank....

A blonde, a brunette and a red head rob a bank. As they are running out carrying their stolen goods, the police begin to chase them down an alleyway.

Running down the alley, the robbers find three large sacks of potatoes to hide behind. "Quick!" said the brunette, hide behind here!"

Th...

A blonde, a brunette and a red head were in a doctors office and they were all pregnant..

The brunette says, " I know I'm having a boy because I was on the bottom."
The redhead says "Then I must be having a girl because I was on the top!"
The blonde starts sobbing uncontrollably and the two other girls start comforting her asking what's wrong...
The blonde looks at them through...

Three women are trapped on a deserted island

Three women, a blonde, a brunette and a red head are trapped on a deserted island, but can see in the distance land with obvious signs of civilization.

On the first day the brunette decides to swim to the next shore, she makes it about 1/4 of the way before she realizes she can't make it and...

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head just robbed a bank.

They run into a barn to hide from the cops chasing them. Each of them jumps into an empty burlap sack when the cops come in.

The cops see the bags so they inspect them. The cops shakes the red head's bag. "Woof woof !" Says the red head. So the cops move on, thinking that it's just the farmer...

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A blond, brunette and red head are all in the delivery room ready to give birth.

The doctor walks in and goes the the brunette and asks how she prefers to have sex.

When she replies "missionary" he guesses she'll have a boy. A few minutes later, the baby is born and it's a boy.

Then the doctor steps up to the red head and asks how she prefers to have sex.
...

A Blonde and a Red Head own a Ranch together...

They have just lost their prized bull. The women need to buy another asap, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go into town and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes into town and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar ...

A blond, brunette, and a red head die and go to hell...

God decides to give these three woman one last chance. He brings them to the stairway into heaven and says, "There are 100 stairs and at each step I will tell a joke. If you laugh you will be sent back to hell. If you make it to the top without laughing, I will let you enter heaven." So it began....

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A blonde, brunette, and red head were on top of a magic mountain

A blonde, brunette, and red head were on top of a magic mountain. The myth of the mountain was that if you jumped off of it and yelled out what you wanted to be, you would instantly turn into it.

The brunette jumped off and said she wanted to be an Eagle, so she turned into an Eagle and flew ...

Why can't you hear a red heads footsteps

Because they walk so gingerly

There was a blond, brunnete, and a red head

They were walking down the street when a van pulled up.

The guy in the van said that he had a magical mirror.
If you tell it the truth then you get a wish.

If you lie, then you get sucked into the endless void.

The three decided to try it out and the red head went first. ...

A Blonde, Red Head and Brunette

were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

Red head goes to doctors office..

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed...

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are running from the cops...

when the ladies duck into the proverbial farmhouse off the main road to hide.

They see three huge wooden barrels, and each climb into one to hide.

Moments later the cops bust down the door and begin their search.

They see the first barrel (with the brunette hiding inside) and...

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are trapped on a desert island....

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are trapped on a desert island. They have been stuck there for 5 days and have run out of food and water. In desperation they all go to the beach where they stumble upon a magic lamp.

They rub the lamp and a Genie pops out and says to the trio, "Thank you f...

A blonde, brunette, and a red head... [OC]

So a blonde, brunette,and a red head are each forced to kill their husbands and dispose of the corpse. They all kill their victim and have the responsibility of disposing of the body so they all throw the body in the trunks of their cars. Now, they each have to drive to the location where they can s...

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The Naked Cowboy

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun, and his boots, so he arrests him for indecent exposure.
As he is locking him up, he asks “Why in the world are you dressed like this?“
The Cowboy says,...

What is the proper way to tell a red head joke?

Gingerly.

A blonde brunette and a red head get stuck on an island 4 miles away from shore

They decided that the only way back is through swimming. The red head gets half a mile and gets tired and turns back. The brunette gets one and a half miles gets tired and turns back. The blonde she gets three and a half miles and gets tired so she turn back.

A Brunette, Red head and a Blonde are on a quick getaway from the police.

The Brunette turns to the other two. "Look!" she says, pointing to an old beat up barn over the hill, "let's go hide in there!". So they pull off down the dirt road and park in front of this barn and run inside. As they walk in, they notice a big stack of large burlap sacks. The Red Head gets the br...

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head die and end up in heaven

They are greeted by St. Peter outside the gates of heaven.

St. Peter says: ‘To pass you must tell me one truth about yourself. But If you lie, you will be sent to hell.’

The Red head walks up to him and says:
‘I’m the pretties girl in the world’

St. Peters snaps his fingers...

a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde were walking through the woods.

They were making their way for quite some time, when all of a sudden, they stumbled upon a pair of mysterious tracks belonging to an animal they've never seen before.

The brunette gets down and takes a closer look. " you guys are silly, these are obviously deer tracks " she laughs. ...

A blonde, a brunette and a red head were stranded on a desert island....

The brunette was a very intelligent woman and was able to figure out using her years of mathematical know-how, that it was 20 miles to the nearest shore and she thought she could swim it.

So off she went and made it out 5 miles and got exhausted and drowned.

After a few days the redhea...

What did the dentist diagnosis the red head with?

Gingervitis

A BRUNETTE A RED HEAD AND A BLONDE WERE IN ...

A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out.

The girls broke out and the brunette said,
"Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us."
So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down.

The next morning, the cops said, "Come o...

A blonde, a Brunette and a Red Head were stranded on an island....

The island was 50 miles from the mainland and the girls all thought they might be able to swim back, so they all jumped into the ocean.
After about 10 miles, the Brunette said, "I'm not gonna make it!" And she drowned.

After about 25 miles, the Red Head said, "I'm not gonna make it!" And...

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A blond, a brunette and a red head go hiking...

and they decide to pull a prank on the blond. They go out and find a rabbit and gut it. The wait until the blond is going to take a crap and throw the rabbit intestines under the blond and run, trying to hold in their laughter. A couple minutes later they hear a blood curdling scream and soon after ...

A blonde is walking down the road and notices a red head

The red head was jumping on and off a set of railroad tracks counting "21,21,21". So the blonde walks up and asks her what she is doing. The red says "Oh nothing just doing this 21,21,21" as she's jumping on and off the tracks. So the blonde decides to join her and they both starting jumping on and...

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are running from the police....

.... they run into a barn to hide. The brunette hides behind a stall of cows, the redhead hides in the goat pen, and the blonde hides behind bags full of potatoes. The police come in and shine their flashlights on the cows. The brunette says "MOO!" and the police shine their lights on the goats. The...

Why are red heads never calm?

Because it's so easy to make a ginger snap.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head get caught stealing the Emperor's pig.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head get caught stealing the Emperor's pig. The punishment for such an offense is obviously death by firing squad. In the holding cell, waiting for their fate, Red head says to the other two, "I have an idea! follow my lead!"
Upon being called, Red head walks up, ...

Three women- a blond, a brunette, and a red head, are all about to be executed by ISIS

The red head was up first. Right before she was going to be executed she yelled, “TORNADO!” All of the ISIS members took cover and she escaped. The brunette was the next in line. She followed in the red-head’s footprints and this time screamed “SANDSTORM!” The gullible ISIS members again ducked for ...

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A blonde a brunette and a red head go camping...

They set up camp and go to sleep for the night. The next morning they wake up to find the red head preparing a deer and cooking it up. Amazed, the blonde and brunette ask where she got it.

"Simple" says the red head. "I followed the tracks, followed the tracks, and BOOM, caught a deer!"
...

A brunette, red head, and blonde are taken hostage on a tropical island...

"Any last words?" They ask the brunette while pointing a gun in her direction.
"TORNADO!", she yelled.
They turn around and look for a tornado, the brunette escapes while they look away.

They pointed the gun towards the red head next and asked her, "any last words?"
"VOLCANO!"
The...

a brunette, ad red head, and a blonde escape from prison

The three ladies hatch a plot to escape from prison by hiding in a laundry truck. As soon as the truck stops, they jump out and make a run for it.
Being in the middle of nowhere they head for a plume of smoke that seems to be coming from a chimney.
Upon arriving at a farm, they hear sirens an...

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A blonde, brunette, and red head are trapped on an cliff...

A blonde, brunette, and redhead are trapped on a cliff with a magic genie. The genie says, "I want to play a game. You each run, jump off the cliff and say something to get you off the cliff alive." so the brunette runs, jumps and says " I wish I was an airplane!" so she turned into an airplane and ...

3 blonde women are on one side of a river...

...wondering how they will get across. The first one decides to pray saying "God please make me smart enough to get across this river." so God turns her into a brunette and she swims across the river. The second also prays saying "Dear God, please make me twice as smart as the last girl so I can get...

I asked a red headed friend of mine what I could do to be just like him.

His response was "You have to go through the long and tough process of becoming a redhead." So, as of today, I have started the process of being trans-gingered.

A Blond a red head and a brunette are stuck on an island

A magic lamp washes up and they rub it and a genie comes out, he says I will give you all one wish each. The brunette wishes to be home, the red head wishes to be with her family, the blond starts crying the genie asks why and she says "I wish for my friends back!"

Old Aussie joke: Why is the lady on the Red Heads matchbox always smiling?

There are 48 heads in her box - of course she`s happy!

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A guy walks into a brothel and ask that the three most requested girls are brought in front of him(long)

A beautiful blond, brunette and a red head now stand before him, yet he simply can't decide who to pick. The man turns to the blond and ask. "Why are you so popular with the customers?"

She smiles an replies "You may not believe this, but when I get screwed in my ass really good, it congratul...

Three blondes

Three blonde women are sitting on the side of a river. The first one says "dear God, make me twice as smart as I am so that I can cross the river". So God turns her into a brunette and she swims across. The second blonde says "dear God please make me twice as smart as you made the last girls so I ca...

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were in their obstetrician's waiting room discussing their pregnancies.

The brunette said she was certain she was going to have a boy, because she was on top when she got pregnant!

The red head said she was certain she was going to have a girl because she was in the missionary position when she got pregnant!

All of a sudden the blonde burst into tears. Bet...

A Redhead, a Brunette and a Blonde

were on the run from robbing a bank, they were almost out of gas so they pulled over and ran into the first store they could find. The redhead hid behind a bag of dog food, the brunette hid behind a bag of cat food and the blonde hid behind a sack of potatoes.

The police seeing their car park...

I have a new girlfriend....

...she is very thin, tall and is a bright red head....

. . We met on Match dot com

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A teacher does a quiz with her class.

She asks the children:" So guys what walks on four legs and hurts to touch?" So one kid goes:" A hedgehog" the teacher responds:" I was thinking of a porcupine, but I like the way that you think, next question, what has wheels and takes me to school?" The same kid answers:" Your car". "It is my bike...

Hotel genie

A blonde, skinny red head, and fat brunette all go to a hotel and rent a room. The brunette goes up first and goes to the bathroom. There she looks into the mirror and sees a genie. The genie says "tell me a true statement and I'll grant any wish, tell me a lie and you die". The brunette thinks to h...

Blonde Moments

There are these two secretaries, a Blonde and a Red Head and the Red Head gets flowers sent to her.The Blonde says, Boy those sure are pretty.
The Red Head says, Yes and I will probably have my legs behind my head all weekend. The Blonde says, Why? Don't you have a vase?

A robber pointed his gun at a brunette in a dark alley.

He said, "I will give you until the count of 3 to give me your purse. 1...2...3". "Cops!" she screamed, pointing behind him. He looked behind, no one was there and the brunette ran away.

The robber then pointed his gun at a red head and repeated, "I will give you until the count of 3 to give ...

A blonde went to the electronic store and she asked..

A blonde went to the electronic store and she asked, "How is much is this TV?"
The salesman said, "Sorry, we don"t sell to blondes."
The next day she came back as a brunette.
She asked the salesman how much the TV was.
He said, "Sorry, we don"t sell to blondes."
The next day she ...

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The dying man

I was working on a case. It had to be a case, because I couldn't afford a desk.

Then I saw her through the window. This tall blond lady. She must have been tall because I was on the third floor.

She rolled her deep blue eyes at me. I picked them up and rolled them back.

We ki...

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I ran into a old friend shopping yesterday

He was with a an attractive looking redhead when I said hi I asked him how he got rid of that bitchy old hag of a blonde he had and how did he get the good-looking red head.
The attractive looking red head then turned to me and said "I dyed my hair"

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Two guys sitting next to each other on a plane...

They each have one black eye. After about 20 minutes one guy finally looks to the other and says "Okay, I gotta know, how did you get yours?"

They guy laughs and shakes his head "It's actually pretty funny. I was in the airport getting a ticket for this flight and, well the woman behind the c...

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It's a blond joke

A blond, brunette, and a red head decide to see what their daughters carry in their purses.

The brunette opens up her daughter's purse and finds a pack of cigarettes and says OMG my daughter smokes I'm so ashamed.

The red head opens her daughter's purse and finds a crushed beer can an...

The magic carpet

Three girlfriends (a blonde, a brunette and a redhead) go to a carpet store that was advertising magic carpets for sale.

They enter the store and the salesperson greets then and informs them that only one magic carpet remain, all the flying ones were sold and the one remaining was a truth te...

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A beloved UPS man was moving away in his local neighborhood and he was doing his last deliveries...

the first home he went to a red head answered and gave him a card and a hug saying how much he will be missed and the best of luck! He gave her the package then and moved onto the next house. A brunette opened the door and kissed him on the cheek and a card saying he will be missed and the best of l...

A cowboy gets captured by Indians...

So a cowboy gets captured by indians. The indian chief comes up to him and says "ok, we're going to kill you, but I'll grant you three request before we do". The cowboy says "ok, first I'd like to talk to my horse. The chief thinks this is weird but says yes.

The cowboy whispers in his hors...

Blonde Joke

A brunette, a red head, and a blonde walk into a magic shop. The owner tells them about a magic mirror that makes people disappear when they tell lies.

The girls walk up to the mirror and take turns testing to see if it works.

Brunette: “I think I’m the smartest girl in the world.”...

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