UPJOKE
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A joke from India

Translated from Hindi:

There is a queue outside the bank where people are waiting to get in and exchange currency. One chap keeps cutting the queue and goes to the front. The rest of the people keep forcing him back.

This goes on 5-6 times. The guy finally gets pissed and says

'...

A pet store owner walks into a brothel

The head mistress greets the new guest: "And how can we help you today?"


The pet store owner asks "Do you have a parrot I could buy?"


The confused head mistress responds "Don't you own a pet store? And don't you already have some nice parrots, why do you need ours?"
...

California on lockdown

California has decided to lock down its cities. Many queued to get the Covid-19 test. After queuing for hours, one guy told the person next to him and said “I can’t take it anymore, I am going to kill Trump, please save the queue space for me”.
After a few hours, he came back to his queued space....

NASA Scientists were eagerly waiting for the rover to send back the first sounds from Mars.

A program decades in the making, a feat of engineering never before accomplished. Not only did they include high resolution cameras for the landing, but incredibly robust microphones to capture the first sounds from an alien planet.

The team of people were huddled around a lab station for hou...

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An oldie but a goodie

A towns prison was overflowing with inmates, and they were running out of room for new prisoners.

The local police force decided to allow two criminals to be punished by the public for their crimes. One was a wife beater, and the other was a rapist.

There was a queue in front of each c...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hot Russian Catholic Girls (Or Orthodox, I guess) [NSFW]

There was a bomb at the Russian Catholic Girls' school, and all the girls died. Being Catholic, they were greeted by St. Peter at the gates.

They're all queued up and St. Peter says to the first one, "Have you ever touched a man?"

She thinks for a moment then recalls, "Yes, I did, I to...

Prom night.

This high school kid had a crush on the girl of his dreams, but she was dating someone. However! The pair broke up a month before prom, and he decided to make the move.
He didn’t ask her out on the first week because that would be too soon. And he got sick on the second week.
Week 3 he was a...

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