UPJOKE
albert einsteinludwig boltzmannerwin planckphysicsdiffusionboltzmannneutron starhegelphotonscraterotto hahnlise meitnerkielholsteinmunich

Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Werner Heisenberg, Georg Ohm, Galileo Galilei, Max Planck, and Louis de Broglie were carpooling to work...

...when they got pulled over for speeding. However, when the police officer tried to ask them how fast they were going, he couldn't get a straight answer, and the group was so rowdy that they had to be brought in for questioning.

So all 7 of them are taken to the police station, and individua...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I measure my penis in Planck lengths...

And I still can't get wood.

Planck's constant walks into a bar...

Planck's constant walks into a bar and orders dessert.

The bartender is a little surprised by this, but happens to have a couple desserts on hand.

"I can't decide," says Planck's constant. "Whenever I walk into a bar I feel divided by two pies."
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Why did the quantum physicist have such toned abs?

Because they planck constant.
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What do pirates do when they get sick of your physics questions?

They make you walk the Planck.
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Why did the pirate fail his Physics class?

He constantly tried to walk the Planck.
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What’s the price for mutiny in the sub atomic realm?

Walking the Planck.
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The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.

The second best time was 20 years minus one Planck time ago.
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What did the subatomic quantum pirate say to the theoretical physicist?

Walk the Planck
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What’s a quantum physicist’s favorite trend?

Plancking.
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Why did the scientist have such strong abs?

Because he kept his Planck’s constant
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