UPJOKE
mouseratrodenttraphouse mousetrap playbaitterrariumgerbilflubbererectorhamsterrat traptoastermanoeuvre

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Three rats are at a bar telling stories on how tough they are....

The first rat takes a shot and says, "Whenever I find rat poison, I like to crush it up and do lines just to get a good buzz for the day."
The second rat takes a shot and says, "That's nothing! Whenever I find cheese on a mousetrap, I purposely trip the spring & right before I get crushed I ...

Three mice walk into a bar...

After a few drinks, they get into a heated argument about how tough they are.

The first mouse says, “When I see a mousetrap, I lay on my back and set it off with my foot. Then, I catch the bar with my teeth and bench press it twenty times to work up an appetite. Only then do I make off with t...

Two guys at a yard sale are chatting, one says “whatcha got there, pal?”

“Fella over there sold me a bunch of dominoes, a paint can, a ball, and a mousetrap”

“What in the hell would you need all that junk for?”

“He said I can use it to crack an egg”

“You’re such a rube, Goldberg”

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3 drunk mice

3 mice are up late at night, drinking and bullshitting, as mice often do. Just eating cheese bits and chasing them down with copious amounts of alcohol.

They begin to brag about how tough they are relating various experiences evading the cat, the exterminator and other adventures, each one...

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How to be a macho mouse

Three very macho mice are standing around trying to outdo each other. The first mouse says, "You know those little pellets they put out around the house trying to poison us? I love those things. I eat 'em like candy." The second mouse, not to be outdone says, "Oh yeah? Well, you know those mouse...

A cat eats a slice of swiss cheese...

and sits by the mousetrap with baited breath.

Three Badass Mice walk into a bar.

Three mice walk into a bar.

The first mouse takes a swig of his beer and says, "I am a badass mouse. In my neighborhood, we have these big mousetraps. I'm so tough that I walk up to them, grab the cheese, catch the bar and press it up and down with one arm while I eat the cheese. I'm a badas...

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