More Information Jokes - 16 Hilarious More Information Jokes

When does Sean Connery's accent provide more information than regular English?

When he's sitting on a toilet.

(and you just read that in his voice)

Historians have discovered more information about the Ancient Greek hero, Bophades

According to Ancient Greek mythology, Bophades was a powerful hero, much like Achilles. In fact, the two heroes are very similar. Achilles had a weakness in his heels, and historians have now discovered that Bophades had a weakness in his groin. Many people have heard of Achilles's heel, but have yo...

A patient with a serious illness was visiting his old doctor

Before showing the exam results, the doctor needs more informations about his patient, and asks:

-So, what's your job?

-I'm a seer.

-Hmm nice.

Then the doctor puts it on the paper, very slowly.

-Can you do it faster, please? I don't have all day...

The programmer detective

After weeks of hard work, the programmer detective had narrowed the criminal down to two suspects.

He just needed a bit more information.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lawyer dies and finds himself in front of the gates of heaven.

St. Peter is holding a clipboard and asks his name, then checks his list.

"Says here you were a lawyer, is that correct?"

"Yep," says the lawyer, "that's correct."

"Well, here's the thing," St. Peter says. "We don't get too many lawyers making it past the gates here. We'll need ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to a bank every wednesday to deposit hundreds of thousands

He comes in with a big bag of money, every wednesday and deposits large amounts of money. The manager gets suspicious after a while and when the next wednesday comes, approaches the man:

-Good morning and welcome sir, you must be one the richest customers of our bank. We are thankful for choo...

A panda walked into the restaurant where I work as a server.

He came in, found a table and sat down. Hesitantly, I approached and took his order. He ordered sooo much food. He ordered at least one of every entree. I faithfully took notes and read them back to him. Satisfied, he sent me away to give the orders to the kitchen staff.
I took a detour to ask m...

Take care while walking on uneven pavements.

For more information- see trip advisor.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One winter day, Donald Trump looks out his window...

and notices a large yellow scribble imprinted on the snow that has covered the White House lawn. He was horrified to see that it was in fact a message that read, "Trump is an ".

Trump immediately ordered his Secret Service agents to investigate this; within a few hours, they reported to h...

A mathematician, a biologist and a statistician sat at a bar

Across the street they saw a man and a woman enter a building. 30 minutes later the man and the woman appears with a child.

The statistician said that this is clearly a case of faulty data. There is more information here than we have.

Nonsense, said the biologist. Clearly this is a sim...

One day Jesus was strolling around...

...when he comes across a sad old man, searching something desperately.
"What are you searching for old man?" He asks.
"My son." responds the old man.
Jesus tells the man that he will aid him in finding his son. But wanta more information: "Do you have any information about him? Anything s...

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So, a frog walks into a bank...

A well dressed frog with a briefcase and dark shades walks into a bank and sits down at a desk. The clerk is a bit shocked to see a frog in a suit and tie but, being professional, asks the frog how me can help him.

"Umm, hello sir, My name is Patty, how can I help you today?"
"I ne...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A middle-aged guy decides it’s time to get fit so he heads down to his local gym.

When he gets there he sees a poster promising “6 month super motivational packages, available in Silver, Gold and Platinum”.

Intrigued the guy asks for more information.
The guy from the gym says “OK” and calls for someone to come out from the back office. A beautiful fit woman comes out a...

A Mexican woman gave birth to identical twins and gave them up for adoption...

A couple from another state was looking to adopt twins, so they called and asked for more information. The lady at the adoption agency emailed a pic of one of the boys, along with the details.

"You only sent one picture," the wife says. "Where's his brother?"

"Don't worry," says the la...

A man is on his death bed and he tells his wife fight never to fight with her in laws after his death.

He says otherwise every time she fights his body would turn in his grave. She agrees and he dies peacefully. The wife lives her life out and when dies is buried in the same cemetery. At the night she asks her neighbors have they seen her husband Bob.

The neighbors tell her there are like hund...

Trump wants to build the wall he promised

He asks for quotes from all over the world. He gets 3 quotes.

Chinese guy quotes $3mil
European guy quotes $7mil
Indian guy quotes $10mil

Trump decides to call them for more information.

Chinese guy says 1 million for stones, 1 million for labor, 1 million profit.

...

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