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Metal Band Jokes

What do you call a heavy metal band With financial problems?

Megadebt

What is Jesus Christ's favorite metal band?

Nine Inch Nails

Once I tried to start a metal band...

...but gave up as I couldn't find a good conductor.

What's Santa's favourite heavy metal band?

Sleigher

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My poem about a heavy metal band's best album is being read on British radio

ABCB on ACDC's ace CD on BBC

So an IT guy is really bad at his job and decides to quit and start a Nu Metal band.

It was named: System Always Down

I like metal bands with female lead singers...

Something about women screaming makes me rock hard.

The special ed students made a metal band.

It’s called Syndrome of a Down.

What's the one note a black metal band will never play?

Gsus.

Ever heard of that Hebrew metal band?

Guns N' Moses

I'm in a Medieval-themed metal band

We're called "Bards of Prey."

I want to make a lord of the rings themed metal band called

Nightmare on helms deep

I'm thinking of creating a new heavy metal band.

Osmium should do it.

What did the Janitor call his safety warning inspired metal band?

Slip not.

[Political] What's a pro-choicer's favorite metal band?

Dying Fetus

A metal band comprised of Chernobyl survivors

6 Finger Death Punch

I'm going to start a metal band that writes songs about how important it is to connect with people in your professional network...

...and call it LinkedIn Park.

I'll show myself out now.

NPR recently started a heavy metal band.

'All Things Dismembered'

Did you hear about the heavy metal band that also makes Christmas music?

They're called sleigh-er

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did Moby Dick join a heavy metal band?

He could really whale.

Did you hear about the heavy metal band that started a huge protest but without shouting or talking? They ended up destroying a bunch of property, though...

It was a quiet riot

Instructions

According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U. S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated, "Wash. Biol. Surv. " until the agency received th...

I like to think of terrible pickup lines. Here's my most recent one.

"Hey girl, are you a mainstream, late 90's, early 2000's heavy metal band with a lisp?

Becauthe I'm 'Down with the Thickneth."

Looks her up and down.

What do you call a punk band that knows how to play their instruments?

A metal band

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fun Facts

The reason that their are only 49 contestants in the Miss America Contest is because nobody wants to wear a banner that says "IDAHO"

My mind is like a bear trap. Rusty and illegal in 37 states.

My neighbour knocked on my door at 2 AM! Can you believe it? He's lucky I was up playing wit...

Du Hast

German heavy metal band Rammstein travels to Poland for the next stop on their international tour. As the airport official goes through their passports and checks them in, she asks, "Occupation?"

The singer replies, "No, no. Were just here to perform a show. We'll be gone by tomorrow morning....

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