Life Insurance Policy Jokes - 9 Hilarious Life Insurance Policy Jokes

A man is asked by his friends why he doesn't have a life insurance policy

"Because I want everybody to be really sad when I die!" He grins.

My wife is amazing

She just bought me a $500,000 life insurance policy and a free all-inclusive trip to the Dominican Republic!

A genie tells a man he gets four things, but his wife gets double it.

The first thing he wants is a million-dollar life insurance policy.

The genie says ok, but your wife gets a two-million-dollar policy.

Then, he asks for a new car.

Ok, but your wife gets two.

Then, he asks for an 8 bedroom house.

Finally, he asks to be beaten hal...

When your a spoiled brat and your dad is a trusts lawyer

Kid starts throwing a tantrum in a department store:

Kid: If you don’t buy this for me for Christmas I’ll kill myself!”

Dad: “Well then it’s a good thing I took out that life insurance policy on you”

Kid: “Ughhh! I hate you!”

Dad: “I love you too”

Kid: “Didn’t you ...

Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage...

...a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large life insurance policy on his wife, with himself as the beneficiary, and arranging to have her killed.

A "friend of a friend" put him in touch with a nefarious underworld figure who went by the name of "Artie." Artie expla...

I've got the worlds greatest wife

For our anniversary, she got me a life insurance policy and a trip to China.

A 76-year old walked into an insurance office...

and asks to buy a life insurance policy. The salesman asks him how old he is, and he says that he's 76. The salesman replies that you can't buy a policy over the age of 75.

The old man replies "But my 99-year old father came here last week and bought a new policy"

The salesman replies ...

Old man goes to the pharmacist...

Pharmacist: Hey Bill, what's goin' on?

Bill: Oh, not much Frank, wife's birthday was a few weeks ago, didn't know what to get her, so I bought a 100,000 life insurance policy.

Pharmacist: Not very romantic, but practical I guess.

Bill: Yeah, she really liked the idea and securi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Last night, my husband and I were talking about what we wanted if we died.

He explained to me that he wanted to make sure that our three children were taken care of, as well as me. He went over the life insurance policy he’d gotten from work, and it was very generous. Being a huge social butterfly, he wanted a big funeral, with a fun after party and he wanted to be buried....

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