UPJOKE
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What's the difference between a Lich and a Vampire?

One's a Necromancer. The other, a Neck-Romancer.
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A lich walks into a tavern

The whole place fell silent. The customers have heard tales of their existence, but most have never seen a lich before. The lich plops himself down at the bar counter, a few seats away from a human warrior and his busty mage companion. They exchanged looks.

"Whoa," the mage whispered. "It's a...

The one thing that bothers me about Halloween is the Racist Lich that comes around

He's always screaming about Wight Power
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Why was the lich's wife's neck covered in hickeys?

He was a neck romancer.
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A Chinese man dies and goes to hell

He arrives in time for Hell orientation. As he walks into the orientation room, he looks around and finds an empty seat and sits down. The orientation staff woman starts off the meeting with a roll-call:

"Do we have Mr. Johnson present?"

"Here," says a man.

"Mr. Smith?"
...

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