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You had sex with a dinosaur?

Jurassic bastard

I was watching Jurassic park the other day.....

.... when I thought "not only does my son have a really stupid name, he´s also a terrible driver"

What movie did you go see?

My parents had great fun teasing each other and yanking each other's chains.

They were visiting me (38m at the time) and my wife+kids, and my Dad & I went out to see a movie. We found Jurassic Park I (in 3D), and went to see that. It was an enjoyable experience.

When we were on o...

What do you call it when two dinosaurs run into each other?

A Jurassic jam.

A blonde goes to watch Jurassic World in 3D.

Whenever dinosaurs run towards the audience, she is cowering in fear on her seat. The person next to her tells her "Don't be afraid, it's just a movie".

Blond replies, "I am a human, I can think, I know it's a movie. But that's a dumb beast, what does it know?".

Who would blow up Jurassic Park? Really?

A dino might.

What do you call a blind dinosaur?

Doyouthinkhesaurus

(Full Disclosure: I'm showing Jurassic Park to my kids for the first time)

What do you get when you cross a pig and a dinosaur.

Jurassic Pork.

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What do pandas say on Halloween?

Bam-BOO!

That's the entire joke but this subreddit won't let me post such a short joke, so I'll tell a little story like one of those irritating-as-fuck internet recipe intros that gives WTMI.
My four year old is fascinated by finding the perfect joke. He'll often pick up on jokes from tv ...

What did the canadian dino wear to keep warm?

A Jurassic Parka

So I saw that the new dinosaur in Jurassic Park is a hybrid

Guess that makes it Priustoric

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Jeff Goldblum is a given a chance to go back to Jurassic Park

Against all advice he decides to go and is airdropped from a plane on the island. On his way down he gets awe struck by the beauty of it all and forgets to chute till it's too late.

Luckily he ends up landing on something soft and squishy. After a brief moment of relief he realizes he's stuck...

What would "Jurassic Park" be called if it was filmed during WW2?

Jewrassic Park.

You know what else was opened before it was ready?

Jurassic park.

Who's Ji-Sung Park's great, great, great, great, great grandfather?

Jurassic Park

Did the dinosaur era actually exist?

You bet Jurassic did

I just saw Jurassic World...

It was DINO-mite!!!

A'thank you, I'll show myself out.

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What did they serve for lunch at Jurassic Park?

Chilean Sea Bass. Spared no expense.
Didn't you watch the movie?

I never thought they would make another Jurassic Park...

...But sequels, uh, find a way.

How do you hide a dinosaur from the government?

You take jurassic measures.

Going to a restaurant alone makes me feel like a dinosaur in Jurassic Park

Everyone is just there to watch me eat.

My wife told me to chill with the dinosaur jokes.

I told her Jurassicing a lot of me.

Yes it is terrible, yes I am a dad and yes ill stop scrolling and go to bed now. Salam my friends.

Yo mama's so fat...

her wedding music was the jurassic park theme

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I can predict your favorite movie with one simple trick..

This math test will determine your favorite movie.
Amazing!
This is pretty damn amazing. Mine turned out to be Gone With The Wind. Thats my favorite movie! I was surprised how this worked.
.
Be honest and dont look at the movie list till you have done the math!
.
Try this test and ...

What do you call a female Dinosaur with herpes?

A Gina-sore.
I am drunk and watching Jurassic Park. Forgive me if this had been thought of before, I assume it had but it made us laugh a lot. Have a great night!

What would you call Spiderman if he was Dinosaur man instead?

Jurassic Parker

Can a joke about dinosaurs make you laugh?

You bet jurassic can

If the Genesis flood happened in prehistoric times...

...It’d be Jurassic Ark

what do you call a 145 million year old swine carcass?

Jurassic Pork

Ill show^myself^out

What did Noah say after he let the dinosaurs in?

Welcome to Jurassic Ark

Would it be dangerous for a human to live 65 million years ago?

You bet jurassic would.

Why did the paleontologist measure the height of a dinosaur using a T-Rex's foot?

Jurassic times call for Jurassic
Measures.

Do dinosaur's look cool?

You bet jurassic does

Yo mama..

is so old that Steven Spielberg used her as a dinosaur consultant in Jurassic Park

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