A guy meets his friend and notices that he's anxious and jittery.
Man 1: What's wrong?
Man 2: I've been having a bad day.
Man 1: What happened?
Man 2: When I opened my door, the damn knob broke on me!
When I turned my faucet on, the damn faucet broke on me!
When I tried to pick up my briefcase, the damn handle broke on me!
Why did the snake look so jittery?
He took too much Adder-all.
My weight-gain parcels have just arrived and I'm feeling really jittery. I might have to go and see a doctor.
I think I've got the shakes.
A Dachshund and a Labrador are walking together when the former suddenly unloads on his friend.
“My life is a mess,” he says. “My owner is mean, my girlfriend ran away with a Pomeranian and I’m as jittery as a cat.”
“Why don’t you go see a psychiatrist?” suggests the Labrador.
*“I can’t. I'm not allowed on the couch.”*
A Scary Midnight Story
A taxi driver is going home at midnight when he decides to take a shortcut through a cemetery. He's driving slowly through the dark when he suddenly stops in shock. In front of his headlights is a lady in white hailing him down.
Before he has time to think, the woman climbs in and says in a ...