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Jared Fogle Jokes

Jared Fogle Of Subway Started and Ended His Career The Same Way.

Trying to get into smaller pants.

What do you call a fight between a Mexican and Jared Fogle?

Alien vs Predator.

Did you guys hear about Jared Fogle from Subways transformation?

He used to have mild cholesterol problems, but they turned into child molestoral problems.

How did Jared Fogle lose 40 pounds?

He broke up with his girlfriend.

I had a good joke involving Jared Fogle, Roman Polanski, and Jimmy Saville walking into a bar

But it occurred to me that they wouldn't be somewhere where there wouldn't be minors.

Jared Fogle was sentenced to 16 years in prison

He told the jury that he was happy with anything under 18

Why does Jared Fogle like all the jokes about him?

Because they are about five years old at this point.

What's Jared Fogle's favorite weather?

El nino.

Jared Fogle is going to prison.

It looks as if his steady diet of footlongs will continue

Fun Fact: Jared Fogle was a Mormon

I heard he graduated top of his class at Bring Em Young University

Is Jared Fogle going to jail??

Because I heard he's looking at 8-12 years...

What's Jared Fogle's favorite time of day?

When the big hand touches the little one

How did Jared Fogle lose so much weight?

because he chose from the kids menu

Jared Fogle gets sentenced 15 1/2 years in prison

At least he'll still be able to enjoy footlongs

Jared Fogle likes his subs like his women.

6 & 12

How is the Copiapó mining accident and the Jared Fogle scandal the same?

In both cases some miners got screwed

Jared Fogle was given 15 years in prison today...

He was reportedly ok with it, and when reached for comment stated "As long as it's under 18."

One thing won't change for Jared Fogle while in prison

He will still be eating 6" to 12" daily.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So Subway spokesperson Jared Fogle is being investigated for child pornography

I guess he really did want to "eat fresh"

What are the first words Jared Fogle's girlfriend said to him?

"Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies, sir?"

What did Jared Fogle say when his wife told him she wanted kids?

*Me too*

It appears that Jared Fogle has gain 30lbs since going to jail

I guess that's what happens when you stop the child portions

Jared Fogle of Subway told his wife she didn't have to worry about the Ashley Madison leaks...

...he was on Club Penguin.

Losing weight is so easy now. I'm just chasing the kids around all day

- Jared Fogle

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