UPJOKE
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Hyper Jokes

Apparently, Elton John owns a pygmy rabbit that is super hyper and runs all the time.

It's a little, fit bunny.

Reddit's being overrun by an evil cabal of hyper-intelligent cow-people, and I have proof!

[remoooved]

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My therapist said my hyper-independence was unhealthy.

I then realised I didn't need a therapist.

I had a hyper dog called Syndrome

Every time someone came round my house he used to jump around them. Then I have to say "Down Syndrome!"

What's the square root of a hyper cube?

A sugar cube!

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My girlfriend left me because I'm hyper critical about my penis...

I guess she can't take a joke

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Yesterday, I got one of those extremely authentic, hyper-realistic sex dolls- and she’s so life-like it’s almost eerie!

For instance, as soon as I got her home last night she told me we should just be friends...

What do you call attempting to jump to light speed before checking the Hyper Drive first?

A Wookie mistake!

A 3rd grade class goes to the swimming pool... (/r/AskReddit comments section liked it and I was told that you might like it, too)

*It's a joke I know in french. So I tried to translate it and did some improvments since my first comment, too:*

A 3rd grade class goes to the swimming pool.

The lifeguard asks to the class: "Does any one of you already know how to swim?"

Then the little Dimitri, all excited, an...

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It’s been a long week in the greengrocers ….

It’s been a long week in the greengrocers but it finally gets to Friday night and three best mates - a lemon, a potato and a pea - decide to have a couple of beers after work, as so often happens, soon they’re on a full on pub crawl...

They have a great night, hitting pub after pub , knocki...

I have ADHD and I always think I’m sick.

My doctors call me the Hyper Hypochondriac.

TIL about the hyperactive hippopotamus with hypoglycemia

The hyper-hypo hippo.

What do you get for winning a bodybuilding contest?

A HyperTrophy

Bad egg jokes I thought of

1) what do you call it when you see a pretty egg?
- Egg sighting

2) what do you call it when a really annoying egg is quiet?
- Egg silent

3) what do you call it when a really hyper egg holds still?
- Egg static


4) what do you call it when an egg wonders if there is ...

Mathematicians have found a new, advanced strand of Ebola...

called Hyper-bola


I'm sorry :(

[Long] I was working the register of a pharmacy when a woman came up to me asking for breath mints.

I pointed her to the candy aisle and told her they were about halfway down on the left.

She said that she'd been down there already, and that all of the mints had loads of sugar in them, and if she them they'd make her hyper and overly excited.

I had never heard of anyone getting too e...

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3 Guys in hell

This is the story of an engineer from intel, a guy from the pentagon, and a small skateboarder all three ended up in hell after signing a contract with the devil himself

so he says to them

\- I will give each of you a chance to go to paradise, but beware, no second chance, it's eith...

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An Old Joke

The year is 2120, and our story follows Joe McFlinch and his journey to overcome his inner demons. 'Who is Joe?', you may be wondering. Well, Joe is a cowardly 29 year old male. He has no special talents or skills, no hobbies, and most sadly, no friends. If I were to describe him as a dish, he would...

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general knowledge quiz

Teacher: "Good morning children, each Thursday we're going to have a general knowledge quiz.

The pupil who gets the answer right can have Friday and Monday off and not come back to school until Tuesday."

Wee Jock (a typical Scottish wag) thinks, "Ya dancer. Ah'm pure dead brilliant at ...

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