There is a street corner where hookers wait around to be picked up

On a light post nearby a parrot is hanging around. As he watches he says, “Same old hookers, same old clients”

This is bad for business so one of the hookers get mad at the parrot and throws a rock at him. He falls down onto the ground. The next morning a nun is walking and sees the parrot. ...

My city's hookers are putting on a charity event to support local animal shelters.

They're calling it pound-for-pound!

What do you call hookers in the winter?

Frostitutes

What’s something both hookers and Santa can say during the holidays?

It’s my busy season.

What do hackers and hookers have in common?

5 letters.

Also, they both deal with viruses.

There's a pilot for a new reality show based on hookers in a brothel.

It's call "Deadliest Snatch".

What does a golf course have in common with half a dozen hookers?

18 holes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?

Well, I know it’s more than 7 because my basement is still dark.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two hookers are standing on a corner,

Hooker#1: “You ever been picked up by the fuzz?”

Hooker#2: “No but I’ve been swung around by the tits!”

Hookers dont fart

They let out little prosti-toots

What's a hookers spirit animal?

Crabs

Why didn't Gandalf bring hookers to Bilbo's birthday party?

Because he is not a conjurer of cheap tricks.

Why won't a pimp let his hookers use gas station bathrooms?

Because of the "no merchandise beyond this point" sign.

A mother and her young daughter were visiting New York City.

The mother was trying to hail a cab when her daughter noticed several wildly dressed women who were loitering on a nearby street corner.

The mother finally hailed her cab and they both climbed in, at which point the young daughter asked "Mommy, what are all those ladies waiting for by that co...

You wanna know how I know that good hookers aren't worth the money?

Because I always overcharge clients.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call people who have trade jobs can't afford to hire individual hookers?

A jackoff all trades.

Have you heard the one about blind hookers?

You've really got to hand it to them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Santa Claus breaks down in the hood

So, one Christmas Santa Claus's sleigh broke down in the hood, around a bunch of hookers, and Santa Claus got knocked the fuck out, and the cops rolled up and asked what happened, and the hooker said, ain't nobody gonna be callin me a hoe 3 times

What do hookers and criminals have in common

They’ve both been in hand cuffs

How come we call walkie-talkies "walkie talkies", but we don't call vacuums "pushie suckies"?

Because that title is reserved for wheelchair bound hookers.

Hookers on Naval Subs

Substitutes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(nsfw) Why should you only ever have sex with hookers with one hand?

It's the only sure way not to get the clap.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the guy who had sex with 3.14 hookers?

AIDS. He got AIDS and died.

What, you were expecting a pi joke?

On my cake day??

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young lady becomes a hooker, and after her first night on the streets, the other hookers are asking her how it went...

"Well, the first guy I met was really hot! A marine with all kinds of muscles!"

"Ooh! Nice!" another girl says. "How'd it go?"

"Well I told him it was $50 for a fuck. He said he didn't have that much. So I told him it's $25 for a blowjob. He didn't have that much either. So I said it's...

Hookers were prepared for the pandemic

because they’ve always offered curbside pickup.

Why dont hookers do black friday specials?

Because they usually have things half off.

What are Christian hookers good at?

Missionary work.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two hookers were on a street corner

They started discussing business and one of the hookers said, "Yep, it's gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air."

The other hooker looked at her and said, "Nah gurl, I just burped.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three hookers were sitting at a bar.

The first one said: "I can get three fingers up my fanny." And proceedes to demonstrate this to the other two. The second one laughed and said " That's nothing. I can get a whole fist up mine." And she duly obliged to show the other two.

The third one slid down the barstool.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend of mine realized that he had to give up coke, drinking and fucking dirty hookers every day

During this time of abstinence, his physical health improved a lot. He put on some healthy weight and even some muscles. However, mentally he got really depressed, a total wreck. He was especially sad over his new sex life.

Long story short, now he's back at it again; drinking, taking cocaine...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.