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Honoured Jokes

According to the Time Honoured British Tradition...

They are now outsourcing their problems to some Indian guy when they invest neither the resources or time or skill to resolve it themselves.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner.....

A Priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner. However, he was delayed, so the Priest decided to say his own few words while th...

She offered her honour. He honoured her offer.

And all night long he was on her and off her

News: Trump would be “honoured” to meet North Korean dictator.

“He’s my kind of guy — crazy, overweight and has a ridiculous haircut.” Said North Korea’s dictator.

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Penises are an important part of human culture and anatomy and must be honoured

I suggest we erect a statue

I made a pencil with two erasers.

It was pointless...

PS: I actually didn't, but it's my favourite bad joke, and it's my cake day, so I can do whatever I want!

Edit #1: If you didn't see my comment somehow, I feel scammed, because at the time of posting this, I yet had like 2 hours of my cake day left. I guess Reddit d...

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A proud new Dad

A proud new Dad sits down to have a drink with his father.

"Well son, now that you've got a kid of your own, I think it's time to give you this"

"Dad, you don't mean-"

"Yes son, I do" *Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition*

"Dad... I'm honoured..." he says, te...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just patented my new combination aphrodisiac and stool softener!

SexLax: "Easy come, easy go!"

Wow! A sort-by-new gold! I'm honoured!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman went into the doctors in tears.

The doctor asks what’s wrong and she says “nobody will have sex with me because I’m so deformed.”

The doctor replied “come on now you’re an extremely attractive lady, I’m sure any man would be honoured”

She said “no doctor it’s my deformity, it’s grotesce, I have 3 vaginas”
The d...

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The tale of how I was Knighted by the Queen

For as long as I can remember, I have had the ability to do these mind-blowing poses as I ejaculate. I became so famous for this ability, that I was asked to perform for the Queen. Needless to say, I was incredibly honoured and excited! And a bit nervous. So they flew me out to England and I was pra...

So Thor hears about the other gods coming down to Earth for a good time ...

and decides to try it out for himself.

Meets a girl in bar and they get hot and heavy all night. At the end, he decides to tell her how he's honoured her: "I am Thor!"

And the girl says: "You're thor? I'm tho thor I can't pith."

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