January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels..."duh"...bottles won't fit in typewriter!
March - Got excited...finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months...box said "2-4 years!"
I saw my wife using her phone to record her getting a haircut..
i think she's planning to watch the highlights later..
Every time my wife gets her hair dyed, she records it on her phone.
I think she watches the highlights later.
I'm utterly opposed to any form of egg cracking on anyone's head and I totally condemn the act of the underage violent vigilante who cracked an egg on senators head. However with that being said what it highlights is the endless distribution and importing of eggs all around the world. Rising fear of...
I videotaped my hair today
I’m going to watch the highlights later
News: A car crashed into a hair salon yesterday afternoon.
Still waiting for the highlights!
A husband and wife are spending the day at the beach
While they are enjoying the sun a very attractive young woman in a bikini thong walks by, puts down a towel, removes her top, and lays down in front of them. The wife happens to catch her husband making glances at the younger woman and becomes jealous. "Is that what you want? You want me to get a fu...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Welcome to the eleven 'o clock news
I am your anchor Francis FullOfFrenchPeople. In today's highlights, a group of scientists were hospitalized when a monkey they had been running tests on in a lab got violent and started throwing flaming feces at them They were said to have suffered Turd Debris Burns.