A fortune teller sat in his tower, practicing seeing into the future.
Instead of using tarot cards or a crystal ball to read the future, he used fine cloth he imported from the East. One day, as he was peering into the future, a strong guest of wind blew through his open window, carrying the cloth straight out the other one. With it being his sole future-seeing cloth,...
A blacksmith is stressed
So he goes into his shop and starts holding a sword straight against the grindstone. His apprentice comes in and asks "What are you doing?"
"Oh just taking the edge off"
Old Joe was well off, he owned his own land, and on that land, a huge farmhouse.
The farmhouse was much too big for himself and his lady to upkeep, so he sort some help at the local slave market. He put them up in his converted barn, and paid them all a small allowance each day.
A man asks a blacksmith to refine some ore....
The blacksmith says "put the ore on the bench, then beat it. I'll do it once I've finished up at the grindstone". The man says to the blacksmiths assistant "that was rude" and the assistant replies "what can I say, he has an axe to grind".
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Always loved the awful jokes on The Two Ronnies.
"Well, that's all we have time for tonight, but before we go, here are a few items of late news:
"Roughhouse Row, Tower Hamlets, which is London’s toughest street, held a party today for its oldest inhabitant. He’ll be twenty-three on Monday."
"F. C. Rawls, the train conductor, who has...