Dog Year Jokes

Dog years are bullshit. My dogs 10 and she still chases tennis balls when I throw them. When my grandma was 70 and I threw a tennis ball and told her to get it she smacked me in the head and walked away muttering.

I tried to explain it to them but they didn’t seem comforted when I cleared up the fact that my German Shepherd is actually 21 in dog years.

A drunk man, 35 years old, walks into a bar. Stumbling through the bar, he finds a seat and asks the bartender for a whiskey.

The bartender, seeing how drunk he is, is hesitant to serve the man. "How much have you had to drink today?" he asks.

The man responds, "Today's my Anniversar... read more

A guy is driving around the back woods of Georgia and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog for Sale .'

He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Beagl... read more