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4 Minutes Jokes

I was 16 minutes late for my first math lecture, 8 minutes late for the second, and 4 minutes late for the third.

At this rate, I’ll never be there on time.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had for an hour and 4 minutes last night

Thank you daylight savings for helping me set a record.

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Men vacuum in the same way that they have .

They just put it in and make some noise for 3 or 4 minutes before they collapse on the couch, thinking that their wife should be really happy.

I had a Red Hot Chilli Peppers CD for 4 minutes and 43 seconds

After hearing this one track, I decided to give it away give it away give it away now.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Good or bad ?

Two women are talking:

“How was the last night?” one asks.

“A catastrophe! My husband came from work, had dinner in 3 minutes, after we had 4 minutes , he was deep sleep 2 minutes after! That fucker! And yours, How was it? “

”My, was AMAZING! My husband took me out for a...

A man buys a parrot for $2,500

The minute he brings the parrot into his house, the bird starts cussing at him, screaming, yelling and calling him every degrading name in the book.

Day in, day out, all the parrot does is give the poor guy a hard time.

The man tries to be nice, he tries pleading with the parrot, he ...

My performance in the bedroom is like a high-sticking call in hockey.

Typically 2 minutes, but 4 minutes if there's blood.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you like listening to music whilst having

Listen to a live album, that way you'll get an applause every 3-4 minutes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Had with the wife for 30 minutes

last night. That's about 4 minutes in human time.

A Guy walks in an Irish Pub

A guy on vacation in Ireland walks into a pub and says
"I hear you Irish can drink, I'll give a thousand bucks
to the guy who can drink 10 pints of Guinness in under 5 minutes"
Everyone is quiet but one of the Irishmen gets up and leaves.
In a few minutes the Irishmen walks back ...

My Greek friend translated this joke

A guy walks in a bar and goes and sits at the bar, he nods to the barman who goes to him to serve him.

The guy seems edgy and says to the barman “get me a double scotch before it begins”. The barman doesn’t really make a deal out of his attitude and just gets him the drink. 3-4 minutes later ...

Speedy Gonzalez got a job at construction site.

His boss liked his lunches as fresh as possible. One of Speedy’s responsibilities was to go to the boss’s house each day at noon to get the lunch the boss’s wife had just prepared.

Speedy was the fastest to ever have this responsibility. Everyday for a year it took Speedy exactly 5 minutes to...

Why is it bad to be an egg?

You only get laid once.
You only get eaten once.
It takes you 4 minutes to get hard and only 2 minutes to get soft.
You have to share your box with 11 other guys.
The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother.

A man and his wife attend the wedding of a mutual friend.

The ceremony is beautiful. The man and his wife are both struck with nostalgia and joy as they sit and remember their own wedding day. They hold hands throughout the ceremony, moved nearly to tears. Then, at the end of the ceremony, the new couple even walk out to the same song the husband and wife ...

A girl misses a guy.

A girl misses her ex-boyfriend. After thinking it through, she decides to text him.
"I miss you. Please come back into my life." She texts him. Her phone buzzes after 4 minutes. "Where are you now?" The boy texted back. The girls heart is pounding hard. "Home, in my room." She texts. Her phone b...
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