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Walkie Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sex over Walkie Talkie

Person 1: Bend over

Person 2: Bend what? Over

I bought my wife and I Walkie-Talkies for our anniversary but I can't tell if she likes them.

Wife: "We don't need Walkie-Talkies, this marriage is over."

Me: "This marriage is what? Over."

So I bought myself and my girlfriend walkie talkies

Gf: “You’re too childish, this isn’t working and it’s over”

Me: “Sorry, this isn’t working and it’s what? Over“

I broke up with my girlfriend via walkie talkie

She didn’t get it, no matter how many times I said it was over.

A walkie-talkie invited a lump of coal to dinner and a movie.

Classic example of radio-carbon dating.

Girl: "Come over"

Guy: "I'm coming over"

Girl: "We should stop using walkie talkies in bed, over."

I want to post a walkie talkie joke

But I need to think it, over.

"You're so childish!" screamed the wife. "Why do you always have to use that stupid walkie talkie with your stupid friends?! This is ridiculous, this relationship is over!"

"This relationship is what? Over!"

Girlfriend: “Why do we need walkie-talkies? Our relationship is over.”

Boyfriend: “Our relationship is what? Over.”

My wife was fed up watching me play with walkie talkie everytime. So she said , "Our relationship is over"

I replied, "our relationship is what?". Over.

What did Iron man say to Captain America on the walkie talkie?

Steve, Roger that?

If the man who made walkie-talkies named a few other objects:

Laxitives: passy-gassy

Loofah: cleanie-beanie

Ocean wave: wooshy-splooshy

Socks: heaty-feeties

Musical: singy-thingy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had phone sex with my boyfriend over a walkie-talkie.

I could hear him coming from a mile away.

Moses

Nine year old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school.

“Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the ...

What's the worst christmas gift you could give to Steven Hawking?

A Walkie-Talkie.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's 1956 and iconic film director Cecil B. DeMille isgetting ready to shoot the most expensive scene ever filmed: the parting of the Red Sea in his movie "The Ten Commandments."

The scene required 2200 extras and 800 animals and could be shot only once. So DeMille arranged for one not, not two, not even three cameras but four camera/cameraman set-ups surrounding the scene.

Everything's in place. DeMille shouts, "Cameras! Action!" and the scene unfolds. The moment it...

Two soldiers in a forest

Two soldiers are patrolling a forest, suddenly one of them collapses to the ground and the other begins to panic.

He picks up his walkie talkie and contacts his captain, he says "I need help! my partner collapsed to the ground and isn't moving, I think he's dead!"

The Captain responds:...

What do you call a cross between a centipede and a parrot

A walkie-talkie

Wedding gift

Wife: are you serious? This is your wedding gift for our 30 year marrige?
Me over walkie tolkie: you didnt say over.over.

Two men arguing

I was in a nightclub queue when two blokes in front of me started arguing.

One guy pushed the other and said, "Four, nine."

The other man pushed him back and said, "Sixteen, twenty-five."

A bouncer reached for his walkie-talkie and said, "I need some help at the door. We've got ...

The Pope is visiting the U.S.

As expected, he gets a private chaffeur and a limousine.
He has always wanted to drive one, but is never allowed to. He decides to ask the driver.

The driver thinks about it for a minute, bad decides he can't say no to the Pope. And besides what could go wrong?

The Pope gets in t...

My girlfriend told me I was too childish.

The other day, I bought her a pair of walkie talkies.

She squinted her eyes at me and said, "Our relationship is over."

I squinted my eyes right back and told her, "Our relationship is what? Over."

What do you call a caterpillar with a phone?

A Walkie Talkie

I don't understand all the fuss about getting rid of guns in America. Just do what Steven Speilberg did.

Replace all the guns with walkie-talkies. Not that hard!

Bachelor shopping

A man, enjoying bachelorhood while his wife was away visiting her parents, lived like a typical bachelor, living on whatever was in the pantry.

Cauliflower in the fridge? Fry them with the eggs found there and that's lunch and dinner. Don't want to cook? Open up the cans of soup in the pantry...

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