UPJOKE
diphthongconsonantsyllablephonationalphabetlettersemivowelschwavowel soundphonemesintonationsoundpronunciationphoneticr-colored vowel

I once fell in love with a girl that only knew 4 vowels

Unfortunately she didn't know I existed.
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What do you call a word with loose vowels?

Inconsonant
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Why is O the noisiest of the vowels?

Because all the rest are inaudible.
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Why do the vowels refuse to acknowledge their sixth member?

They don't know why
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"When I eat alphabet soup, I only eat..."

the vowels."

Friend: "Why?"

Me: "Sometimes."
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

All the vowels are having a masturbation contest.

They're trying to prove who would last the longest in bed, so they decide to start by seeing who can last the longest by themselves. As they start, A finished within minutes, closely followed by O. Several more minutes pass, and U cant hold it any longer, climaxing. Y, deciding they didnt identify a...

British English has only three vowels : A, I , O.

They have left E.U.
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What's the difference between learning vowels and learning computer science?

When learning vowels, it's only sometimes "why?"
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I once met a guy who was convinced that there were no word in the English language with more syllables than vowels.

I tried to explain to him that he was wrong, but he refuses to accept criticism.
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What did the y say in the final stand off during the Battle of the vowels of and Consontants?

‘We’re not so different, u and I’
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I've lost all control of my vowels...

Now I'm completely in consonant.
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We lost all the vowels from our Scrabble set.

So I sold it on Ebay as a Welsh edition.
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The word “you” is made up entirely of vowels.

Yeah it’s not a joke, but when I tried to upload it to r/showerthoughts, I was told that wordplay wasn’t accepted. So here we are.
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Is there a word that contains all the vowels, including Y?

Unquestionably.
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Vowels, who borrowed 50 bucks from preposition 5 months ago goes back to return it.

But because of some reason preposition couldn't remember anything about it and asks what this is about. Vowels exclaimed- "Ae! I owe you!"
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28 consonants, 3 vowels, a question mark and 1 comma went to court

They're awaiting their sentence
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I was really happy when I discovered a word with all five vowels.

It was euphoria.
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My friend is running around trying to get rid of silent vowels

but I say it's a waste of Tim.
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"Bananas" and "synonymous" have the same amount of Ns and vowels

They're ... basically the same.
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What do you get when you take the vowels out of Reince Priebus' name?

RNC PR BS
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's a 6-letter word that starts with the letter “n”, has 2 vowels in it, the letter "r" in it, and perfectly describes black people?

Normal.

I ate an expired can of alphabet soup...

Now I have severe cramps in my vowels and I've been in-consonant all day
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Blonde Moments: Life with a Blonde Teenage Daughter

SCENE: My teenage daughter and me in the car.

Lauren: Dad, do you know what the most commonly used letter in a girl’s name is?

Me: Hmm, is it a consonant or a vowel? (Silence.) Please tell me you know what consonants and vowels are.

Lauren: You’re no fun, Dad. Forget it.

...
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I looked longingly into my beloved's eyes and whispered, "A, E, I, O, U...and sometimes, Y."

The priest then turned to her. "And has the bride prepared any wedding vowels?"
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What's the best thing about playing Wordle on the toilet?

You can eliminate vowels and your bowels at the same time.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy joins a monastery

A guy goes to join a monastery while he's waiting for the monastery to accept him and his vowels of silence he's allowed to ask things about what they do at the monastery.

They guy feeling a little on the horny side one day pulls a monk to the side and asks him quietly what to do when he's g...

"There were a load of vowels chasing me home. I checked behind me and they were catching up on me, and they looked really angry, like they wanted to hurt me. I didn't know what to do, dad," said my son.

I said, "OK...Summarize..."


He said, "Yeah, but not many."

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I hope this isn't a repost, I came up with it on my own but it seems like it should be a thing already

My friend (I call him E) and I went to a competition for our children a few months ago on who could name the most vowels. He gave me five dollars to go get a drink. Now when I walk my daughter to school, I see him and always remember that I owe him money. So, I call out, "Hey! E! I owe you!" For som...
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I ate too much alphabet soup and became consonated.

I was better after I evacuated my vowels.
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My friend and I were talking yesterday and

## he asked me if I sometimes randomly recited the English vowels. I replied, "Sometimes, why?".
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