Skyrim Jokes - 24 Hilarious Skyrim Jokes

How do you set your digital location to Skyrim?

You use NordVPN

I tried to argue Skyrim was the best game

..but I was down voted to oblivion.

What would a Skyrim guard say if he saw you choking a little girl?

No loli gaggin'

I would have told a joke about skyrim

But they keep getting dunmer and dunmer.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Skyrim is a lot like sex

The first time is amazing

The second time is nearly as good

But by the hundredth time you've tried everything and the only way you can have fun anymore is to modify the hell out of it and get really really into roleplaying

With each new release of skyrim on differing platforms, what is guaranteed for skyrim superfans?

More solitude

What’s the difference between the Thalmor and a brick?

A brick will actually help rebuild Skyrim

How does an old man zoom in in Skyrim?

The elder scrolls

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Skyrim guards and Pornhub share a similar rule

No Loli Gagging

What virtual private network is most popular in Skyrim?

NordVPN

I can't stand it when my friend plays Skyrim.

Personally I play a lawful good approach, trying to stay out of trouble, but when I invite Jacob Yu over he goes full-on thief! Always breaking into homes, stealing things, getting fined and thrown in jail. I ask him on occasion if he'd prefer a different playstyle, but he simply prefers this one. S...

What's a rimjob on an airplane called?

Skyrim

Why isn't there a neutron mod in the Skyrim Steam Workshop?

Because there'd be no charge.

what is the opposite of downvoted into oblivion?

Upvoted into skyrim.

D&D...

is just math disguised as Skyrim.

People say sticks and stones may break your bones but words can never hurt you.

Unless you live in Skyrim where words can kill you

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call eating ass on a plane?

Skyrim.

My girlfriend told me she would lick my bumhole on the flight if I stop talking about my favourite Bethesda game.

I can't wait for my Skyrim.

People say the brain is a computer, but if it is...

Why can't it run Skyrim?

I’ve heard that since Covid has so many variants they’ve decided to rename it.

To Skyrim.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is it called when you eat ass on a helicopter?

Skyrim.

The Fallout games are the most unrealistic games I've ever played.

I mean, how is there no Skyrim remastered for the Pip-Boy?

5/7 unplayable.

A new redditor comes to r/jokes

"Welcome!" Exclaims r/jokes.

"Hi," says the redditor, "tell me a funny joke please."

"Alright. Let me see what i can find." Replys r/jokes before heading off

While the redditor waits they, binge the entirety of Game of Thrones, watch the entire extended directors cut of...

A Microsoft Dev walks into a room....

Bethesda is working on Skyrim remastered 4k edition for the new xbox.

Microsoft Dev "Woah that screenshot looks cool"

Bethesda Worker: "That's not a screenshot, it's...it's the game"

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