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How is procrastination like masturbation?

It feels good at the time, but in the end you’re just fucking yourself.

I finally found the perfect way to fix procrastination

But I'll have to tell you later.

I decided to do my thesis on procrastination 40 years ago.

Maybe I should start it next week

I’ve been thinking of stopping my procrastination

Maybe I’ll start tomorrow

I found a book on how to avoid procrastination...

I think I'll read it tomorrow

Someone really needs to start a procrastination club

Maybe I'll get around to doing that tomorrow

I got a good joke about procrastination!

Meh, maybe later.

What does procrastination mean?

I don’t know, ask me later.

I’m addicted to procrastination

But I can start anytime I want

I had a good joke about procrastination planned

But ill probably post it tomorrow

I made a joke about procrastination.

I guess I'll just post it later.

A week ago Thursday was National Procrastination Day. . . .

Time to celebrate!

I walked up to the master of procrastination, and asked him to teach me his ways.

He looked at me, smiled and said "Later."

Try and name a better duo than me and procrastination

Go ahead, I’ll wait

My dad is a master at procrastination

He never even finished that...

What do we say to the God of Procrastination?

Not Today!

I'm gonna watch a video on how to stop procrastination....

Nvm, I'll watch it tomorrow.

Procrastination will be my downfall.

Emphasis on “will”.

A man was convicted of murdering his wife of 30 years

Before handing the sentence, the judge addressed the defendant: "The court would like you to explain what made you murder your wife after over 30 years of marriage".
"Well, your honor" answered the defendant "it's mostly procrastination. Every day I kept telling myself I'll do it tomorrow..."

How do you avoid procrastination?

I have a great punchline, but I’ll edit it in later.

My brother asked me "what does procrastination mean?"

I said "I'll tell ya tomorrow"

I was going to say a joke about procrastination

But I decided to tell it tomorrow

It’s not fair that procrastination gets such a bad rap.

It has literally kept me alive for years.

I gave up procrastination for lent this year.

Well.. I’m working on it.

If procrastination was a class offered in school

I’d get an “i” for “Incomplete”

I'm finally going to take care of my procrastination problem

Just you wait and see!

This book, “The Procrastination Cure: 21 Proven Tactics For Conquering Your Inner Procrastinator”

I have had it in my Amazon shopping cart for six months, I will probably order it tomorrow.

What country had a history of procrastination?

Russia. At one point, they were all for Stalin.

I want to know what the word "procrastination" means

I'll look it up tomorrow.

I want you to close your eyes for a moment and imagine a world without procrastination…

…actually, nevermind let’s do that later

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My therapist just told me I might be a chronic procrastinator and that it will seriously affect my life. I'm not worried though

I'll figure out what procrastination means later

I bought the book titled "How to beat procrastination" to fix my procrastinating habit.

It's been 5 months already and I haven't opened that book yet.

My wife just got her degree in procrastination.

She said she would pick it up next week.

I just saw a book on Amazon called "Overcome Procrastination"

I've put it on my wish list.

Wanna have a procrastination contest?

Great! We’ll start tomorrow

Me: man I reckon i'm the greatest procrastinator in the world, no one's better at procrastination than me

Friend: oh really? how about we have a contest

Me: yeah sure just gimme 5 minutes

Teachers: “Procrastination is bad!”

Theresa May: “Hold my government”

"What do we want?" - A cure for procrastination!

"When do we want it?"
- Soon...

If there was a competition for procrastination...

I'd probably put that off til later too.

TIL That procrastination stems from 2 basic personality traits

I'll post the link in a minute.

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Masturbation is a lot like procrastination . . .

... it's often more pleasurable while done gazing at yourself in front of the mirror.

The three rules about procrastination.



New study shows procrastination is as harmful to mental health as alcohol abuse

To combat this, I've decided to form Procrastinators anonymous, please consider joining it!

after 9 months of procrastination, of psyching myself up and never following through, last night i finally went to the gym

to cancel that damned membership.

I wish there was a medicine that could cure procrastination

Eh, who am I kidding, I'd probably put off taking it.

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