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Pleadingly Jokes

A student comes to a young professor's office hours...

She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she whispers, "I would do... anything."

He returns her gaze. "Anything?"

"Anything."...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy, who is not very well endowed, unfortunately is getting married in a week and he’s freaking out...

He’s so embarrassed by the diminutive size of his member, he doesn’t know what he’s going to do.
The wedding night comes and out of desperation, he sneaks a large pickle into bed- and successfully gets through the night. As a matter of fact- that’s how he gets through the next several years unti...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On his recent visit to England Trump is very taken with all the pomp and regalia of royalty...

So while having dinner seated next to the Queen he announces boldly that from here on in he would like the USA to be referred to as the "United Kingdom of America!"
The Queen shakes her head and says somewhat admonishingly, "My dear Donald you can't do that - you are not a King".
A bit defe...

Just after the US Civil War, a handsome and proper Texan Colonel, a beautiful young debutante, and a foppish city boy from the east found themselves travelling by train through the heartland of Texas.

As they rode in silence, the Texan couldn't help but notice the city boy kept staring at the young woman. He scowled his disapproval each time he caught the boy's eye, but the boy kept staring at the woman.

Finally, the city boy screwed up his courage, placed his hand on the debutante's knee,...

A masked man walks into a bank

"Open the safe" he shouts at the woman behind the counter.
"Sir I think you've made a mistake, this is a sperm bank."
"I SAID OPEN THE SAFE!" He repeats.
The woman opens the safe.
"Take out one of the vials" says the man.
she takes out a vial.
"NOW DRINK IT!" he yells.
The woma...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man takes a taxi in the pouring rain...

He tells the driver to head for the airport, shaking water off his hat and fanning his coat to get some more off the whole time. It is then, halfway through the drive, that he notices he's forgotten his wallet. He frantically searches his pockets, but all he finds is a 20 dollar bill.

He asks...

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