Stare at the ceiling. _____________ **Thank you** /u/JustNick4 for giving this joke the extremely desirable **Evil Cackle Award**. I've never won an Evil Cackle Award before, so as you can imagine, I'm over the moon. I'm going to put it in the candy bowl every Halloween for the neighbor kids ...
A boy was asking his dad what the difference is between "confident" & "confidential".
Son to Dad: Dad, what is the difference between "confident" & "confidential"?
Dad: See, here is an example, you are my son, i am confident of that.
Son: I see
Dad: Now, you know our neighbor, little Timmy, your playmate right?
Dad: He's my son too, bu...
Two men and a woman are stranded on an island
Two men and a woman are stranded on an island after a plane crash. Resourceful, they waste no time, build a house, find food and water, and globally have it good. After one month, the woman goes to the two men and says:
"Okay guys, let's be frank. I have my needs, you have your needs, let's d...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Little Johnny is hanging out with the older kids at school
When one of them starts talking about his ex girlfriend and calls her a cunt.
Little Johnny has never heard that word before.
Later at home, he tells his mother about the older kid calling his ex girlfriend a cunt. Johnny asks his mom, what is a cunt?
Little Johnny's mother does...
Tom, a notorious womanizer...
...dies and goes to hell.
The devil is walking him down the brimstone corridors, showing him around the place. "You know, Tom," he says, "just because you're in hell doesn't mean you have to stay here. You can go to heaven if you'd like... and sit on a cloud all day, playing the harp... i...
Hugh Hefner Peacefully Passed Away From Natural Causes Today.
Playmate Natural Causes could not be reached for comment.
A little girl walks into the kitchen and asks her mother . . .
"Mommy, can I have a baby?"
Her mother smiles and says, "No, sweetie. You're too young."
"Are you sure?" The little girl asks.
"Yes, I'm sure."
The little girl then goes back outside and says to her playmates, "Okay boys - same game."