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Patronising Jokes

It's kind of patronising

that a computer asks you to prove you're not a robot...

What do you call a patronising thief walking down stairs?

A condescending con descending

People reckon I'm too patronising

(that means I treat them as if they're stupid).

My wife said she's leaving me because i'm too patronising.

I said "Ooh, 'patronising' that's a big word!"

How do patronising people like their steak cooked?

Well Done

Since passing my art exam, I've become very patronising.

If you don't know what that means let me draw you a picture.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman driving along at speed passed over a bridge, only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic, patronising smirk and asked: "What's your hurry?"

She Replied; "I'm Late For Work!"

"Oh Yeah?", Said The Cop, "What Do You Do?"

"I'm A Rectum Stretcher," She Responded
The Cop Stammered, "A-What...?"

"A Rectum Stretcher!"

"And Just What Does A Rectum Stretcher Do?"

"Well," She Said, "I Start By Inserting One Fi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old lady goes into a bank...

Coutt's Bank, to be exact, and asks to open an account. She is told, politely but coolly, that they are a very exclusive bank and have stringent requirements for prospective clients. "I know," she says. "May I see the manager, please?"

She is shown into the manager's office and repeats her re...

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