Why did the 22140857×10^23 molecules of Methyl Acetate go to jail?

It was a Mole-Ester!

A Hobo/Tramp walks into a hardware store and asks for a bottle of methylated spirits

The cashier refuses to sell it to him, ‘you’ll just drink it! It’s terrible and will kill you, I’m not selling you this!’

‘I promise I won’t, honest to God I won’t drink it!’ Says the hobo.

‘Ok, I’ll sell it to you, but no drinking it!’

‘Thanks!’ Says the Hobo as the cashier rea...

Methylated Spirit

A scruffy homeless man walks into a DIY store.

"Bottle of methylated spirit please."

"Look mate, no offense but I wasn't born yesterday. I can't sell that to you when I know you're just gonna drink it."

"Hey, what are you implying? This is ridiculous, I'm using it for woodwork!"...

What do you call the ghosts of those who OD'd on meth?

Methylated spirits

I have excellent chemistry with the girls I stalk these days

By chemistry, I mean the reaction of 8-methyl-*N*\-vanillyl-6-nonenamide with my eyes.

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