A guy just finishes his lasik surgery and his surgeon leads him in his office to discuss the surgery...
The surgeon asks if he wants the good news or bad news first.
The man excitedly ~~replys~~ replies, "I'll take the good news first."
The surgeon tells him, "well you're about to get a new dog."
This joke may contain profanity. ๐ค
An attractive blonde was failing math class...
She approached the professor, distraught, and asked if she could speak with him.
He, of course, was eager to assist.
She then sat down, and started to explain ...
'Professor, when I was 8, my appendix burst and they had to take it out.
I then wrecked my bike and they had...
My doctor said if I get 1000 upvotes he will perform free LASIK surgery!!
Upvote for visibility.
A man is having LASIK eye surgery
**Ophthalmologist:** John, stay calm. This is a simple procedure and the odds of blindness are very low.
**Patient:** Thanks, but my name isn't John.
**Ophthalmologist:** I know, mine is.
Next year, I'm going to get lasik eye surgery...
I'm really looking forward to 2020 vision.
I just got LASIK done and I highly recommend it to everyone thinking about it.
20/20, would do again.
I should have gotten LASIK several years ago
But I guess hindsight is 20/20
After his wife passed away, he stopped wearing his glasses. His sister saw him and exclaimed: โAww it must be so hard for you, nothing is worth seeing anymore after sheโs gone?โ
He said: โWhat? No, I sold her jewelry and paid for a Lasik surgery.โ
If I had a dollar for every report a 2020 vision joke received in the past few weeks
I'd have enough money to pay for LASIK to fix my vision. Thankfully, I won't need to, as I'll have 2020 vision come Wednesday.
This joke may contain profanity. ๐ค
There was a man who had three girlfriends โ repost updated for 2018
There was a man who had three girlfriends, but he did not know which one to marry. So he decided to give each one $5,000 and see how each of them spent it.
The first one went out and got a total makeover with the money. She got new clothes, a Brazilian wax, a new hair color, LASIK โ the works...
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