Cornea Jokes - 23 Hilarious Cornea Jokes

An Irish cornea walks into a bar

The bartender asks “Want a Guiness big fella?”
To which the cornea replied “Eye”.

upvote

downvote

report

A cornea, a female sheep, a tire and a nerd walk into a haunted house

The cornea bounces in first, making plenty of noise all throughout the house, and leaves terrified and satisfied.

The female sheep prances in next, and terrified bleeting can be heard by all, before she leaves in fear.

The tire rolls in next, making loud, frightened rubbery noises insi...

upvote

downvote

report

The hospital taking too long to get a new cornea for my SO.

I need to find a faster wife-eye provider.

upvote

downvote

report

I love bad eyeball jokes

the cornea the better!

upvote

downvote

report

I’m sorry, but I like my jokes like...

I’m sorry, but I like my jokes like I like my eye puns...
The cornea, the better.

upvote

downvote

report

What do you call a unicorn with no eyes?

Unocornea

upvote

downvote

report

I was going to tell a joke about a corn eyeball...

But it just keeps getting cornea and cornea

upvote

downvote

report

I was going to post a Dad-joke about eyeballs.

But I think it would be too cornea for you all.

upvote

downvote

report

I'd tell a joke about eyes

But nobody likes vitreous humor.

It doesn't get much cornea than this.

upvote

downvote

report

An eye-rolling joke

Dad: You know who all I saw today?

Daughter: Who?

Dad: Everybody I looked at

Daughter: Huh?!

Dad: You don't like my vision joke? Too bad, that's how eye-roll ** rolls eyes **

Daughter: I'm not laughing at your eye rolling jokes again

Dad: Why? Is it too "...

upvote

downvote

report

Thought I would never find true love until a beautiful woman stole my heart

And my kidneys, and my corneas, and my lungs.

upvote

downvote

report

I told my ophthalmologist father I didn’t want to hear anymore eye jokes.

They just get cornea and cornea...

upvote

downvote

report

My optometrist likes to make eye puns

they keep getting cornea and cornea

upvote

downvote

report

A man walks into an eye doctor…..

……..he says hello to the doctor, and the doctor says the same. The doctor asks the man if he’d like to hear a joke. The man says yes. “Why does the phone wears glasses?” The doctor asked. The man shakes his head in confusion. The doctor continues, “because he doesn’t have any contacts”. The man frus...

upvote

downvote

report

I was gonna make a joke about eyeballs but..

everything I came up with was extremely cornea

upvote

downvote

report

Doctor told me I have viral eye infection...

Must be the cornea virus

upvote

downvote

report

What do you call a sore eyed joke?

Cornea

upvote

downvote

report

Eyes always tell the worst jokes

They're cornea.

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dapple's Car Accident

Once upon a frosty Canadian winter, there lived a man named Dapple. Dapple was a proud Canuck, born and raised in the heart of the Great White North. He loved the snow, the maple syrup, and of course, ice hockey. But one fateful day, his life took an unexpected turn.

Dapple was driving ...

My optician makes jokes each time I go

They get cornea each time.

upvote

downvote

report

I had botched eye surgery recently and now I can't stop making puns...

My jokes are cornea than ever

upvote

downvote

report

Which profession has the worst sense of humour?

Well, chiropodists like *corny* jokes.
But opticians like them *cornea*.

upvote

downvote

report

The other day I went to get my eyes tested.

I am quite an anxious person and thought I would try to crack a joke to break the awkward silence.

'Would you like to hear a joke?' I asked

The optometrist replied 'Sure! The cornea the better.'

upvote

downvote

report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.