I think my girlfriend is hydrophobic

I can never seem to get her wet

Yes I am hydrophobic

I hate 70% of myself

My shorts are hydrophobic

They don't repel water, they just think it shouldn't be able to adopt or get married.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I think I might be homophobic..

... every time my boyfriend cums on my back, it just slides right off!

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