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This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A parrot is the headliner act for shows on a cruise ship...

One day the cruise hires a really good magician to become the new headliner act. The parrot is furious with jealousy, so he starts watching the magician behind the scenes and eventually begins shouting out the secrets behind his tricks at the shows (i.e. "It's up his sleeve!!" "He used a trap door")...

I went to a concert hosted by the Dyslexics Support Group.

Queef Latina was the headliner and they put on a hell of a show.

Husband: My wife is missing. She went to rescue people from the flood yesterday and has not come home ...

Sergeant at Police Station:
What is her height?

Husband:
Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sergeant:
Weight?

Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant:
Color of eyes?

Husband:
Sort of brown I think. Never really ...

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