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French Military Jokes

Why is the French military always shocked when they lose a battle?

Because electricity flows in the path of *least resistance*

I saw an ad for a vintage French military rifle today

Never fired, dropped once

Why do French military vehicles have rearview mirrors?

So they can see the front lines

Many people recognize that the Russian flag is an homage to the French flag.

But did you know their military flag is an homage to the old French military flag as well? The old French military flag was three white Fleur-de-lis on a field of white. Now the Russians use the same one, just rotated 90 degrees.

How does the French Military advertise its surplus WW2 rifles?

“Brand new, only been thrown onto the ground once.”

I heard that there was a French military leader who used to extract bone marrow.

His name was Napoleon Bone apart

In Germany, we know of a joke

The French military.

This just in: A white flag factory has burned to the ground in Paris...

... Effectively crippling the French military.

French Jokes

What's the standard issue weapon in the French army? A white flag.

What's the only French martial art? Parkour, the art running away.

Like the entrance to Hogwarts, if you look at the French flag from exactly the right angle (like that of an invading army), it turns white.

An Am...

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