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Elon Jokes

What's the difference between Elon Musk and God?

God doesn't think he's Elon Musk.

What’s the difference between elon musk and a lemur?

Elon Musk made an electric car

Lemurs Madagascar

Elon is firing Twitter employees with bad posture

I have a hunch I might be next.

Oh No! Not ELON!

Man is driving along the freeway when he is stopped by a huge traffic jam.

After sitting there for quite a long time, he sees another man walking from car-to-car.

The second man finally gets up to his car. He rolls down the window....

"Hey man, what's going on up ahead?"
...

It's a good thing Elon didn't acquire Reddit, otherwise

(Your post was removed by Reddit admins, and your account was suspended)

Why did Elon Musk go broke?

Because his car insurance rates were astronomical.

I hope Elon Musk never gets involved in a scandal

Elongate would be really drawn out.

Why did Elon Musk choose SpaceX to land on mars?

Because if he chose SpaceY he’d land on 14 year old boys.

elon musk, tiger woods, the pope and a college student are on an airplane …

the plane is going down, the pilots bailed, it’s going to crash.
there’s 4 of them and only 3 parachutes …
tiger woods says “i’m the best golfer in the world, i think i should get a parachute.”
everyone agrees, tiger woods takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane.
elon musk says “i...

How did Elon Musk celebrate 420?

With SpaceX going up in smoke.

Bill Gates and Elon Musk should team-up and make a medicine to treat erectile dysfunction,

and name it ElonGates.

why Elon musk is A true Edison of our time ?

Because He found a way to milk Nicolai after he has been long in the grave, too

Elon Musk lands on Mars and steps out of his spaceship

### "It's a small step for a man, but a giant leap for mankind," says the ground control officer and cuts off all communications.

Why did Elon Musk rename Twitter to X?

So the remaining users could spell it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

if Elon Musk had a dollar for every racial slur & sexist slur on Twitter...

Oh, wait- he does.

Why did Elon Musk abandon his Twitter acquisition?

He wanted to experience, for the first time in his life, the sensation of pulling out

Elon Musk has come up with a fool proof plan of destroying Apple because they refuse to advertise on Twitter.

He plans to buy it.

If Elon Musk's space company establishes a Mars colony, and you have a girlfriend on mars, but later break up because of long distance, she'd be your....

Space x.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elon Musk and Bill Gates combined their enormous wealth and power to develop the most effective penis enlargement pill ever created.

They're calling it Elongates.

Tesla founder Elon Musk is originally from South Africa, which is strange

You’d think he was from mad-at-gas-car.

I like my coffee the way I like Elon Musk

Freshly roasted

Elon: I want to change the company name.

Company: why

Elon: Good one, How about X, instead

Elon Musk: Did you move my car?

Team: Yeah.

Elon: Into the parking space, like I asked?

Team: Parking!?

Now that Elon Musk has bought Twitter and laid off half the staff, he’s planning on buying YouTube and Facebook and doing the same with them. To save even more money, he plans on merging the three companies into one…

…He’s going to call it YouTwitFace.

What do Elon Musk and Thomas Edison have in common?

They both got rich off of Tesla.

Elon Musk is considering removing blocking from Twitter

Which means your only options for defense will now be dodge and counter.

Why does Elon Musk needs therapy?

He's never stopped wanting his X

We can't let Elon get his hands on christmas.

What's he gonna call that, Xmas?

Elon Musk organized a press conference about his project to solve global warming

"I will build giant sunglasses"

Journalist raises her hand. "How does that stop the earth from warming up?"

"It makes it cool"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk and Richard Branson so excited for space?

They’ve fucked almost everyone on our planet and want one last shot at Uranus.

Elon Musk new plan for Mars colonization will include only registered Republicans.

He is going to make it the true red planet.

What did Elon musks get when changing twitters name?

A bunch of X-employees.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elon Musk is being accused of sexual harassment…

I believe it, TSLA share price has been f**king me in the a$$ for months!

How does Elon Musk’s wife call him to dinner?

“Elon, time tweet!”

You know who really gives kids a bad name?

Elon Musk

New Teslas don't come with a new car smell

They come with an Elon Musk.

What did Elon Musk say to Mark Zuckerberg?

Hold my beer!

Elon Musk thinks he's a real life Tony Stark

But he's actually a real life Justin Hammer

Elon Musk has announced a new recipe for chicken soup

First you boil the chicken in water and then you dump the stock.

Elon Musk has only owned Twitter for one day...

and it's already ran over 2 pedestrians.

How rich is Elon Musk?

Musk is so rich that if he wanted to get richer he would have to join congress...

What would Elon Musk do if he bought Madagascar?

Change its name to MadaElectricCar

What is Elons Musk favorite snack?

Mars bars.

Elon Musk and some European guy sat next to eachother on a plane.

Being bored, Musk turned to the European and said; "Lets play a game. You ask me a question, if I dont know the answer, I pay you 500 dollars. Then I ask you a question, if you dont know the answer, you pay me 5 dollars." The European, thinking for a second, said; "sure, but you ask the first questi...

What do you call people who work for Elon Musk's lithium operations?

Minors.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What kind of balls does Elon Musk have?

Teslacles.

Elon Musk and his girlfriend have broken up.

Told her he needed some space.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just found out that Elon Musk has 10 kids.

The only thing he can pull out of is Twitter.

How can you tell Elon Musk joined Tesla after it was founded?

It isn't called X-cars.

Elon Musk, The smartest man in the world

was on a plane along with a hippie and a priest. Suddenly, the pilot comes running back with a distressed look. "The plane is going to crash, I've done all I can. There are three parachutes and since I am the pilot, I am taking one; you three will have to decide who gets the other two." With that th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elon Musk says he is going to pull Tesla out of California

Never trust a guy with 6 kids that says he is going to pull out

Why does Elon Musk make his employees have a net electric charge?

He doesn't want them to be unionized.

Elon Musk rewatches The Matrix.

Realizes that Neo is the good guy.

How did I hear about Elon Musk not actually buying Twitter?

A little bird told me

Elon Musk and Bill Gates had two children

One was Elon Gates, who became the tallest man alive. The other was Bill Musk and he smelled like money.

What did Elon Musk say to Grimes before they made X Æ A-12?

i 1 2 ½ 6

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Breaking News: Elon Musk & Bill Gates have joined hands

to make a Penis Enhancer.....They will call it
ELONGATES

Elon Musk wants to send people to mars

I think we can all agree that he is the most creative serial killer of all time.

Elon Musk has been making bad decisions since getting his hairplugs

He needs toupee

Elon Musk's DM to a hot girl: "Will send pics of my rocket. Lots of thrust. Gets up fast! Wink. Wink." Girl responds…

"Would be nice if it didn’t explode after 2 minutes."

What is Elon Musk's favourite band?

Thirty Seconds to Mars

When Elon Musk converts to Islam

He'd be Elon Mosque.

Where's Elon Musk from?

Mad at gas car..

Source: @anisskuniss on tiktok

What’s Elon Musk’s favourite comedy?

Bambi

Before Elon Musk got into electric cars...

... he was plain old Lon Musk

The good news is Elon Musk is turning Twitter' headquarters into a homeless shelter

The bad news is, it can only house 280 characters, or less

Imagine if Elon Musk got married to Bill Gates and took his name...

Yeah no, you're right... 'Elon Gates' is a stretch.

What is Elon Musk's favorite country?

Mad-at-gas-car

What do Bill Gates and Elon Musk have in common?

They broke windows live on stage.

Did you hear Elon Musk opened a storefront down at the mall?

"Space for Rent"

Did you hear that Elon Musk is planning to buy the entire island of Madagascar?

He’s planning to rename it Madaelectriccar.

Elon Musk has launched a new cologne!

Space-Axe Body Spray™

Elon Musk and Bill Gates have decided to partner in a joint venture to invent a medication to overcome erectile dysfunction.

They have decided to name the new drug 'Elongates'.

Superman would have hated Elon Musk as much as Lex Luthor..

because Elon loves his Crypto.

Elon Musk's right when he says aliens may be living among us.

That explains why some people keep making rockets and trying to leave the planet.

Why doesn't Elon Musk like Taco Bell?

It gives him gas

Why does Elon Musk want so many satellites?

He’s transmitten with them.

Elon's favorite gun.

Elon musket

Why would Elon musk take a chicken into space?

To make spaceggs

People say Elon Musk is a mad scientist. Do you think he relates to Dr. Jekyll?

Because I've always heard he benefited from having a part Hyde.

Which African country is Elon Musk from?

Madatgascar

Elon Musk needs to start a new company,

Elon Must.

I sure hope Elon musk’s $50,000 house isn’t part of another cover-up scandal

Elongate would be very drawn out.

Elon Musk unveils pig with chip in its brain...

...it was from the Kenosha County Sheriff's Department.

Man, you gotta hand it to Elon Musk…

He knows how to dispose of a dead body in style.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elon Musk has Tested his New Nerolink Brain Implant on Pigs

No word yet if it has successfully stopped them from shooting black people.

What's the difference between Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg?

One's a human trying to conquer Mars and the other is an alien trying to conquer Earth.

Note: This joke isn't mine, I heard it somewhere but I forgot where, if it's already been posted send me the link and I'll remove it.

Where are Muslims going to pray when they go to Mars?

Elon's Mosque

Elon Musk

People always talk about how great of an entrepreneur Elon Musk is but he's yet to create a cologne called Elon's Musk.

Why couldn't Elon Musk enter his house?

Because his door was locked and he left the keys in his car.

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