UPJOKE
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What kind of drug should dinosaurs never take?

A steroid.

Three dinosaurs are running across the desert when they stumble upon a magic lamp.

They rub it, and a genie appears.

"I have three wishes, so I'll give one to each of you," the genie announces.

The first dinosaur thinks hard.

"Alright," he says, "I'll have a big, juicy, piece of meat."

Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he'd ever seen appear...

Why can't dinosaurs play chess?

Cuz they're all dead.

They say the asteroid killed all the dinosaurs.

You could say it killed many birds with one stone.

How did cavemen survive the extinction of the dinosaurs?

Temporal distancing

What were dinosaurs called before the meteors hit?

Live-osaurs

How did the cavemen survive the asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?

Social distancing, they stayed 56 million years apart.

Why do you not eat dinosaurs eggs!

Because their eggs stinked

The asteroid event that ended dinosaurs

was technically the highest ratio of killing birds to one stone

What happens when you let dinosaurs drive?

You get tyrannosaurus wrecks.

How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

Tyrannosaurus Checks

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct?

Because of ereptile dysfunction.

I asked my Wife if she was annoyed because I keep talking about Dinosaurs.

But she remained silent, like the 'P' in Pterodactyl.

We tried to tell the dinosaurs that they were headed for extinction

but it was all in one era and out the other.

Did you see the movie about the dinosaurs that couldn’t find the herbs?

It was the land before thyme.

I've heard a theory that the dinosaurs died out because their eggs became rotten.

It was a mass egg-stink-tion!

What do you call it when all the dinosaurs go to heaven?

Velocirapture

Why do dinosaurs make bad pets?

Because they’re all dead.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why can’t dinosaurs play baseball?

Because they’re fucking dead

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Scientists have discovered that some dinosaurs were homosexual in a recent discovery

Megasaurarse will be coming to a museum near you

3 dinosaurs walk up to a shiny lamp

One of them rubs it, and a mystical blue genie flies out of it!

"Hello! I am genie! Since there are 3 of you, you each get 1 wish!

"I wish for a large piece of meat!" The first dinosaur said.

And so a large slab of meat materialized before his eyes and plopped down in front of h...

"Hello, you here to talk to me about Dinosaurs?"

Answer the door and see that its a sale man from an internet service provider. They have stopped at my house ten times in the last year to tell me about the digging in my area and I decided to have some fun with them today. Here is the conversation from today:

Me: Hello, you here to talk to m...

Dinosaurs really got wiped out by a rock

Shoulda picked paper

Why did the dinosaurs girlfriend get pregnant?

Because they did it rawr.

Three dinosaurs stumble upon a lamp in the desert.

One of them rubs the lamp and out pops a genie. "In exchange for freeing me, I shall grant each of you one wish," said the genie.

Excited and clamoring amongst each other, the dinosaurs began to dream of meat.

The first one piped up, "I wish it would rain pepperoni and drumsticks!" The...

Why do dinosaurs like sushi?

Because they like their food ROAR!!!

A joke from my 5 year old: "Know what really killed the dinosaurs? TNT!"

"That's why it's called Dino-mite!!"

"Do you think I reference dinosaurs too much when I write?" I asked.

She was silent, like the p in pterodactyl, but it said everything.

What did dinosaurs prefer to use to pay for their purchases?

Obviously tyrannosaurus cheques.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why didn't they let Yoda name the dinosaurs?

Because the do-or-do-not-ceratops sounds fucking stupid.

Can a joke about dinosaurs make you laugh?

You bet jurassic can

What is a dinosaurs least favorite Reindeer?

Comet.

What was the last thing the dinosaurs said before going extinct?

Edit: Wow thanks for the support guys, this comet really blew up.

What is a dinosaurs favourite deodorant

REXona

Dinosaurs didn’t go extinct

They found Jesus and got raptored

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