Czechoslovakian Jokes - 21 Hilarious Czechoslovakian Jokes

I just had dinner at a Czechoslovakian restaurant…

They asked if I wanted desert and I was like “Czech, please.”

What do you call a Czechoslovakian government made of tightropes and skateboards?

A system of Czechs and balances!

Feel free to tell your history teacher, they'll probably laugh.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Jewish man and a Czechoslovakian man...

..were walking in a national forest. All of a sudden, a bear appeared and ate the Czechoslovakian man. The Jewish guy ran back to find someone to help. He found a Forest Ranger and told him what had happened. So the ranger took a gun and went back into the forest. There were two bears together. "Now...

Why do Czechoslovakians always win at chess?

Because they Czech mate

One day long ago, a Czechoslovakian came to visit his friend in New York

When asked what he wanted to see the Czechoslovakian replied, "I would like to see one of the zoos in America."

To his delight, the New Yorker took him to the zoo. While they were touring the zoo, and standing in front of the gorilla cage, one of the gorillas busted out of the cage and swallo...

An American lawyer invited a Czechoslovakian friend to stay with him in his mountain cabin.

Early in the morning, the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian friend went out to pick berries for their morning breakfast. As they were picking blueberries, along came two big Bears - a male and a female.
The lawyer, seeing the two bears, climbed a tree.

His friend wasn't so lucky and the male ...

A Czechoslovakian and Soviet were hunting in the woods

It had been sometime since they were last seen and people were starting to worry about them. A week had passed and a search party was deployed.

The search wasn’t going well until one tracker found some bear scat with a handkerchief that was thought to belong to the Soviet hunter.

A f...

A Russian scientist and a Czechoslovakian scientist...

...had spent their whole lives studying the majestic grizzly bear. Each year they petitioned their respective governments to allow them to go to Yellowstone to study these wondrous beasts.

Finally, their request was granted and they immediately flew to New York and then on west to Yellowstone...

What do you call a Czechoslovakian abortion?

A canceled Czech.

Czechoslovakian and a Frenchman

A Czechoslovakian and a Frenchman decided to go bear hunting together. After a few days, the village they lived in realized they hadn't come back and sent out a search party to find them. Instead, they found two dead bears: a male, and a female.
The cut open the female bear and found the Frenchma...

One morning, three hunters, a Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Czechoslovakian, entered the forest to hunt bears...

One morning, three hunters, a Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Czechoslovakian, entered the forest to hunt bears. Being somewhat exhausted, the Czech said, "*I'm tired. Why don't you two go hunting? I'll stay here and make up camp for the night.*"

The Frenchman and the Irishman continue hunting ...

A polack and a czechoslovakian went missing in a forest.

A search party of hunters formed and they went looking for the two and came upon two very large bears mating. They shot and killed the bears and cut the female bear open and found the polack's remains in her belly. One of the hunters replied "I guess the Czech's in the male"

In honor of one of my late uncle’s best jokes:

A Czechoslovakian goes to the zoo and heads to the lion exhibit. He wants a closer look at the lions and before anyone could stop him, he was is their cage. He’s soon attacked and eaten by one of the lions.

A witness to this tragic event says to the zookeeper, “I saw the whole thing happen. ...

What do you call an aborted Czechoslovakian?

A cancelled Chzeck.

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A black man and a Czechoslovakian man are walking in the woods...

A black man and a Czechoslovakian man are walking in the woods when they are attacked by a bear. They take off running, and naturally the black man outruns the Czechoslovakian man. The bear tears the Czechoslovakian man apart and devours him.

The black man frantically sprints all the way to t...

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A Jew and a Czechoslovakian man are out hiking in the woods...

...When they encounter bear. The Jew, visibly frightened, asked the Czech

"What do we do!?"

The Czechoslovakian rips his shirt off and pulls out a knife and says ,"Watch this friend" and lunges at the bear in a frenzy.

The bear eats him and the Jew runs back to town to get the ...

What do you call a group of Czechoslovakian special forces guarding a piece of road?

Czechpoint

An Australian is losing badly against a Czechoslovakian in a chess championship match and asks him what country he is from.

The Czechoslovakian wins and replies:
“Czech, mate.”

A classic by my grandpa.

It was funnier because he spoke broken English and cracked himself up every time.

Two Czechoslovakian friends were visiting the zoo. One leaned over the edge of the polar bear pit and fell in. He was quickly gobbled up. The zoo keeper came over mortified and asked the crowd what happened. On...

A man is late on his rent...

His landlord is threatening to evict him.

So he lies "I sent the payment last week I swear! Hey you know the old Czechoslovakian guy that lives below me, Jaroslav? I saw him going through everyone's mail the other day. He must have stole it!"

The landlord calls the cops and the elderl...

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Two men go for a hike. (Long)

A Czechoslovakian and a Russian decide to take a trip to America to hike Mt. McKinley. After their long flight and hauling all of their gear, they get to the base of the mountain. When they reach the ranger station, the rangers tell them that the mountain has had a serious bear problem lately. ...

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