UPJOKE
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Crip Jokes

What do you call a disabled gang member?

A crip.

Why do Crips like swimming in the ocean?

Because sharks can smell Blood from far away.

What’s a crips biggest health concern

High bloods pressure

Why can royals never be crips?

Cause they keep it in the blood

What’s a crips biggest fear?

A blood test.

Where can you find Snoop Dogs crypto

At the end of his Crip foot

A man was arrested for killing gang members, then cutting off their feet and taking them

When apprehended, the man said he had heard it was profitable to sell Crip toes.

I live in a rough neighborhood

There are lots of gangs here, so it's pretty scary at times.

In fact, my neighbor used to be a blood.

Then he fell off the roof. Now he's a crip.

I used to be a gang member with the Bloods, but then I had a baby and realized I had to make some real changes in my life...

So now I'm with the Crips, and me and my little guy can finally watch Blue's Clues together.

Is Superman a blood?

Because Batman took him down with a crip tonight

Why are handicap signs blue?

Because they're all crips.
(Sorry)

In order to help win their gang war, the Bloods in LA have started accepting the severed feet of their enemies as a form of payment.

They’re calling it Crip Toe Currency.

What's the difference between the Bloods and Superman?

One gets killed by Kryptonite, the other gets killed by Crips tonight

Just a week after joining the Bloods, a rival gang member tied me to his bumper and dragged me around town.

It was a Crip-pulling experience.

Street gangs of southern LA have started decapitating each other and using the body parts to trade for goods...

The most valuable of which is the Crip toe currency.

I was out on the west coast, trying to sell some guns to a street gang.

The gang member handed me a bag of severed toes with tiny $'s and tiny blue bandanas tied to them. I said "What's this?! No cash?!" He said it was the latest trend "Crip Toe Currency".

After a few months I wanted to buy a stolen sports car, but had no cash. My friend worked at a morgue so he ...

What do Bloods use as money?

Crip-toe-currency

I live in the ghetto

There are gangs and stuff all around. Actually, my neighbor is a Blood. But yesterday, sadly, he turned into a Crip when he fell off the roof.


Go easy on me, I just thought of that joke.

The best way to avoid getting bitten by a black widow...

...is not wearing a red tie to her Crip husband's funeral.

A blood walks into a bar

A crip walks into a car

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