UPJOKE
builderconstructiveinfrastructurebricklayerstructurearchitectureprojectgirderconstructionrebuildprefabricateconstructedificantedificesuperstruct

Construction Site Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese man are hired at a construction site.

The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the large, muscular, Scotsman he says, "You're in charge of shoveling."

To the slightly less muscular but still large Italian man, he says, "You're in charge of sweeping."

And to the skinny Chinese man he says, "You're in charge of...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A workman is 5 floors up at a construction site and realizes he forgot his hammer...

He leans over the edge of the building and sees his friend on the ground floor. He shouts down to him "Hey buddy I need my hammer." His friends looks up but motions to his ears that he can't hear him.

The workman, thinking quickly, decides to sign out what he wants. He points to his eye for "...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two blondes at a construction site

Lynn & Judy were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity House.

Lynn was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail & either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in.

Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked,

\- "Why a...

A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.

The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.

The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.

He walks over to the Russian, and al...

The strong young man at the construction site was bragging...

...that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen.

After several minutes, the older worker had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a whe...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mom is tired of taking care of Junior, sends him over to the construction site across the street. [NSFW - Language]

As the title says, Mom sends Junior over to hang out at the construction site since she's tired of watching over him...

The boy comes home at the end of the work day and Mom asks, "Well, son, what did you learn today?"

"Well, Mom, I learned a LOT! Like... when you hang a door, if it do...

I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job at the construction site...

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At the construction site

A construction worker on the third floor of a building needs a handsaw.

He sees one of the laborers on the first floor and yells down to him, but the man indicates that he can't hear.

So, the guy on the third floor tries to use signs.

He points to his eye, meaning, "I," then ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A middle school class went on a field trip to the construction site.

Suddenly, a worker falls to his death from the roof of an unfinished building. Because of this, the school decided to hold an accident prevention class. The teacher asks:

"Children, how do you think, why did that man fall?"

"He was standing too close to the edge of the roof!" - said L...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I like to go around to construction sites and give out handjobs.

A Jack off all trades.

Patty and Mick are working on a construction site

Patty says to Mick. “I want the day off, so I’m going to act like a mad person and hope the manager lets me off”

Patty then proceeds to jump up onto the scaffolding and shouts over and over. “I’m a lightbulb! I’m a lightbulb! I’m a lightbulb” He’s swinging around like a monkey on a tree and c...

There was a construction site

There’s 3 labourers, ready for their morning job.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Chinese man.

The boss tells the Englishman, when I get back from lunch, I want this pile of dirt moved over there further.

To the Irishman, after he’s moved it, you need to spread the soil.

To ...

3 men on construction site

3 men are on a construction site of a highrise during lunch

1st guy opens up his lunch box and sees a ham sandwich. He says "ham ham ham that's all I get. If I get another ham sandwich I'm jumping off this building and killing myself."

2nd guy opens up his lunch box and sees a turkey ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old nun was living in a convent next to a construction site

She couldn't help but notice the coarse language of the workers and decided to spend some time with them to correct their ways.

She decided she would take her lunch and sit with the workers and talk with them. She put her sandwich in a brown bag and walked over to the spot where the men were ...

Four guys were working on a construction site

They were talking about life and one of them misstepped on the scaffolding, fell from the fourth floor, hit his head and died on the spot.

His friends were all shaken. They called 911, took all legal actions they should and their friend's body was removed.

One of them, noticing they fa...

Speedy Gonzalez got a job at construction site.

His boss liked his lunches as fresh as possible. One of Speedy’s responsibilities was to go to the boss’s house each day at noon to get the lunch the boss’s wife had just prepared.

Speedy was the fastest to ever have this responsibility. Everyday for a year it took Speedy exactly 5 minutes to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Duck at a construction site

A duck is working at a construction site as a brick mason.

After work one day the duck decides to walk over to the bar.

He sits down at the bar, turns to the bartender and says, “I’ll have a rum and coke.”

The bartender exclaims, “Woah a talking duck!”

“Yeah, what about ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call prostitutes on construction sites?

Tricks of the trade

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little boy wanders into a construction site next to his house.

A few hours later, he comes home and quickly finds his dad.

"Dad guess what. The guys at the construction site showed me how to build a house."

The dad excited, asked his son to show him what he learned. The son gets a roll of string, hands one end to his dad, runs to the other sid...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two construction workers were on a construction site

One of them is working on the ground before the building and the other one is up in the highest floor.
The one on the ground yells at the upper one that he needs the saw which the upper worker is using.
But the upper worker tells him in sign language that he can‘t hear him down there.
So th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sign Language at a construction site

These guys were working at a construction site building a multi story building. A guy on the fifth floor realizes that he needs a hammer but doesn't have one. Going down 5 floor again is too much of a hassle. So, he wants a guy on the ground to bring it up to him. He yells, but because of distance a...

A man worked at construction site...

...and is brought to emergency room with concussion and skull fracture.

His wife, furious, comes to hospital.

"What happened?!"

"Well, I yelled: "John, throw me the hammer!"..."

"And then what?! You didn't catch it?"

"In matter of fact *I did*. But then I remember...

An attorney asks an engineer to gather some evidence at a newly laid construction site.

He examines everything he can - looking for any evidence in the steel beams, the pipes, the equipment around, even the rebar where the foundation will be set in hopes to find anything to use in the case.

With his findings in hand, he returns to the attorney’s office. “Well, I’ve got some good...

The size of the wildlife at construction sites is huge.

I mean, just look at the size of those cranes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There's a new helper on a construction site.

As he has very little experience, he is given to a mean old fitter. All day long the old fitter is, pick up the crap, bring me my wrench, and the kid gets fed up and said "what makes you so special, why you have to tell me what to do all the time?" The fitter says, "because I am smarter than you", "...

I didn’t want to believe my friend was stealing from the road construction site.

But I went to his house to confront him and all the signs were there.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So it's lunch time on a construction site...

An Italian, Mexican, and an American are sitting on top of a construction building. It's their lunch break so they all get ready to eat and the Italian opens his lunch and says " Pizza! If I get pizza one more day I'm jumping off this building". The Mexican opens his lunch and it's tacos, and he sa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman applies for work at a construction site.

Her skills and recommendations are superb, so the foreman is ready to offer her the job. "We are kinda rough here. And we use body parts in our "sign language" to get around the noise and distance on the site."

"No problem," she replies, "all part of the job."

Soon, the foreman is on...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 guys having lunch on a high rise construction site.

As they open their lunchboxes

1st guy says. Bologna sandwich again! If my wife packs me another bologna sandwich tomorrow I'm jumping off this high rise and killing myself.

2nd guy opens his lunch up. Ham and cheese again! If my wife packs me this lunch again I'll jump with ya!
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

English/Scottish/Irish construction site

An English man, Scottish man and an Irish man was working on top of a 400ft building.

Dinner time comes and they all sit down and open their sandwiches that their wives had prepared for them.

English man opens his and it's Ham

English man :- "I'm sick to death of fucking ham san...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

During lunch break on a high rise construction site....

...Dave says, "Hey Daryl tell the crew how you made a fast $50 this morning!"

"It was weird!", says Daryl. "I was on the 23rd floor and bumped a brick off the edge, I immediately yelled out "FALLING BRICK!!!. There was a lady standing at the bus stop below, she heard me, stepped to the side a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny is walking down the street and sees a construction site building new houses

He has a look at what's going on and he's amazed and in awe of it all. He rushes home as fast as he can. He runs in and shouts ''Dad, dad, can we play builders?'' His dad says ''Sure Johnny''

Johnny runs to the top of the stairs and shouts ''Oi, get them bricks up here now you cunt''

Wanna hear a joke about construction sites?

Alright, I'm working on it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bill is laying bricks on the 20th floor of a construction site

When he accidentally knocked a brick, causing it to fall off the edge!
He quickly yelled out "Falling Brick!"

Looking down, he notices that a rather well-dressed businessman has stepped out of the way of the brick and is making his way up to him. "You saved my life mate, here's $100" sai...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy gets a job on a construction site. On his first morning, the foreman is showing him around...

... when one of the workers there puts his tools down, hops up on a cinder block, and shouts out, "73!" All the other workers laugh uproariously.

A few minutes later, another worker goes over to the cinder block and shouts out, "12!" Again, everyone laughs. Puzzled, the new guy asks the fore...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nun walks over to a construction site foreman

There was a construction site next to a convent. Mother superior walks over and asked to speak with the foreman. Mother superior told the foreman that the men have been talking extremely vulgar and the other nuns are hearing this type of language. The foreman replies by explaining to mother superior...

A foreman working on a construction site walks up to his only workers for the day...

They were an Irishman, Englishman and a Chinese.

The foreman walks up to the Irishman and tells him:

"I will be going out for a few hours to do some paperwork. In the meantime I want you to shovel this pile of gravel into the truck so it can be taken away when I get back."

He t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An English Carpenter, an Irish Plumber, and a Chinese Laborer are hired to work a construction site...

The night before they start, the foreman explains “ok, the Englishman is going to build the frame, the Irishman will be running the pipes, and the Chinese guy is responsible for bringing the supplies, got it?”

The three nod, and agree to start setting up the next morning at 8am.

The fo...

What kind of bird works on a construction site?

A Crane.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two men were working on a construction site...

...It is a 5 story building, one man is working on the roof, and the other on the ground. The man on the roof realizes he needs his hacksaw but is already in his harness and cannot go down to get it. Knowing thism he tries to yell down to his co-worker on the ground to bring it up for him, he gets ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with a stutter started his new job on a construction site...

Not sure if this is a repost, my father told me it when I was 11 years old.

A man with a stutter (Dave) started his new job on a construction site and was walking around with one of his colleagues (Jim) being given a tour of the site.
“Th-th-this is a pretty cool p-p-place. I’m so h-happ...

What's it called when there's an accident at a construction site?

Erectile dysfunction.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

John, Simon and Bill are having their lunch on a construction site...

John opens up his sandwiches and says: "ham and cheese, I hate ham and cheese. Don't know why the wife keeps making them".
Simon opens his:
"Tuna mayo. I hate tuna. Why doesn't my wife ever listen!? "
Bill has peanut butter and jelly:
" Disgusting. I'll need to tell my wife to get her a...

So an Irishman, a Mexican, and a Blond are sitting down for lunch at their construction site....

The Irishman opens his pail and says, "CORNED BEEF! My wife always makes me corned beef....If she makes it tomorrow, I'm gonna jump off the platform and kill myself." The mexican open his lunch pail saying, "Tacos... my wife always makes tacos. If she makes it again I'll kill myself too." The blond ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Four men are sitting on a high construction site...

A Chinese man, a Mexican man, an English man, and an Australian.
They have just sat down at the top of the construction site for lunch.

Upon opening his lunch box the Chinese man exclaims,

"Fried Rice, again! If I have Fried Rice again tomorrow, I'm going to jump."

Th...

A construction site worker told his boss

"Boss, the shovel broke ! What should i do now?" to which the boss replies "We're out of shovels. Go lean on something else !"

They hired a comedian at the local construction site. Everyone loves him.

You could say he was really nailing it.

Christian lady living next door to a construction site got tired of hearing the constant cursing from the on site workers.

So she decided one day to pack a lunch and go eat with them while trying to get some religion into the loud, lewd men. Once most of the men had gathered under a shade tree, she walked over with her little brown bag and asked "Do any of you men know Jesus Christ?" They looked around at each other, an...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Ukrainian, American, and Polish guy work on a high rise construction site...

Every day they take lunch on top of the building. Ukrainian guy opens his lunchbox and exclaims: "Fucking borscht again? I swear, if I get another borscht for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building!"

 

American find a PB&J sandwich in his lunchbox and also exclaims: "I...

I was walking past a construction site and the guy hammering on the roof called me a paranoid little weirdo...

...in morse code.

[Credit goes to Emo Phillips]

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Irishman, a Greek and a Jew are working on a construction site

An Irishman, a Greek and a Jew are working on a construction site. They are just finishing up lunch when an iron beam falls from above, killing them all.

In Heaven, Saint Peter greets the three workers. The Irishman remembers Saint Peter from his Catechism and immediately throws himself Saint...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Black man, a Mexican and a Polish man are at a construction site

A Black man, a Mexican and a Polish man are at a construction site having lunch. The black man opens up his lunch and says "If I get fried chicken for lunch again, I'm going to jump off this building." The Mexican opens up his lunch and says "If I get a burrito for lunch again, I'm going to jump off...

After working a construction site in the blistering heat all summer, it made me really miss my old gig.

Because 7/11 was an inside job.

There's a blonde man, a Mexican man, and an Italian man sitting on a construction site eating lunch and...

The Mexican man opens his lunch and exclaims, "Bean burritos again?! I swear if I get bean burritos one more time I am going to jump and kill myself!" Then the Italian man opens his lunch and says, "Seriously?! Spaghetti and meatballs again?! If I get this one more time in my lunch I am going to jum...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Irish Math test

*disclaimer, i didn't invent this joke and i'm not sure who did but i hope you enjoy it...

An Irishman applied for a job on a construction site, but the foreman wouldn't hire him until he passed a simple maths test.
Here is your first question, the foreman said. "Without using numbers, rep...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My son went over to check out a construction project at our neighbor's and it reminded me of this classic...

Little Johnny is bored and asks his dad for something to do.

"Go across the street to that construction site and talk to the workers. Maybe you'll learn something," his dad said.

Johnny was gone all day and finally comes home for dinner. During the meal, Johnny's dad asked, "you were a...

A dog is looking for work...

He stumbles across an open construction site with a hiring sign.

The dog goes to the foreman and says he's willing to work and can start immediately. The foreman asks the dog if he has any experience with carpentry and construction.

The dog replies, "Some; I've got a lot of experienc...

The Lion and the Monkey

A lion and lioness are sitting in their den, when a monkey climbs up a nearby tree and starts insulting the mighty lion.

The lioness starts to get angry and says, "King of the jungle, how dare you allow this puny monkey to insult you? You must punish him."

"You are right, but you know ...

NSFW

Not wearing helmet at a construction site

Daryl was sitting in his house when came a loud knock on his door. He went to the door and a salesman was standing there with an unfamiliar object in his hand. “What’s that?” asked Daryl. “It’s a Thermos.”

Intrigued, Daryl asked, “What does it do?”

Shifting into the sales pitch he said, “This little jewel is amazing. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.”

After some discussion Daryl purchased one thinking it would really help with his lunch situation at work. The next day he arr...

What do you call a bunch of carpenter ants?

A construction site.

a Mexican, an Irishman, and a blonde

are working at a construction site. they break for lunch.
Irishman- "corned beef and cabbage again?! I swear if I get this for lunch one more time, I'll throw myself off the top of this building!"
Mexican- "enchiladas again?! if I get this for lunch one more time, I'll jump off the top of this...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Monkey and Lion

A Lion and lioness were sitting in their den, when a monkey climbs up a near by tree and start insulting lion.

Lioness gets angry and inquire : " King of the jungle how dare this lowly animal saying such insults to you? You must punish him by killing him instantly"

Lion (in its full gl...

Earlier today I was working on a new house in town...

I was in charge of the fencing. The construction site was almost finished, and it was only this and the landscaping remaining. I did the first couple posts, but then I went to lunch, and when I came back, they were gone. I did as much as I could until the day ended, and I went home. I came back the ...

“That’s an excavator. It’s funny when I call it an eckavator.”

That’s it. It’s my three year old’s favorite joke. He tells it to me every time we pass a construction site and cracks up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A

black man starts work on a construction site. The other workers nickname him "Wog".

Feeling upset by this, the black man goes to speak with the foreman. The foreman laughs and tells him, "But we all have nicknames. We've got Mick and Paddy, they're Irish. Wac from Liverpool. And Mack from Sco...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young family moves into a house next to a vacant lot

One day a construction crew turned up to build a new house on the empty lot. Soon the family’s five year old daughter took an interest in what the construction crew was doing and started hanging around them, well soon they adopted her as their mascot of sorts and let her sit with them during their c...

“Just hit my hand as hard as you can”

Two workers were digging underground at a construction site . It was really a tiring job.

Worker A: “Why the hell we need to do all the hard job here for only a meager pay, while that arrogant foreman just sits there sipping the tea so comfy, and pockets much more than us?”

Worker B, ...

My girlfriend just told me her favorite music is heavy metal.

So for her birthday I'm taking her on a trip to a construction site.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This joke made me chuckle

A Chinese guy, an Italian and an Irishman arrived for their first day working on a construction site and reported to the foreman's office.

The foreman pointed to a huge pile of sand and said, "I want you three guys to make a huge dent in that sandpile there!"

The foreman then grabbed t...

An American, a Korean, a Chinese, and a Russian walk into a bar...

...they settled into their seats and when they had loosened up after a few drinks they decided to extol the virtues of their homelands.

"American industry is so superb," said the American. "A sports team can decide to move to a different city, and within a year and a half we can build a stat...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Russians on space

The 60's. Some construction site in Poland.

"Have you heard the news, foreman? The russkies have gone to space!"

"Wha, all of them?"

"No, just one."

"The fuck do I care then? Pass the hammer!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

After a long winter, a mountain lion, a wolf, and a fox...

After a long winter, a mountain lion, a wolf, and a fox get together and each tells how they spent the winter.

The mountain lion says, "I spent my winter in a pigpen, and each day I ate a pig. The owner counted the pigs, saw that some were missing, and set a trap from which I barely escaped."...

Names for groups of animals

We all know some of the common names: pride of lions, murder of crows, etc. But some aren't so well known:

construction site of cranes
chomp of alligators
giggle of girls
cancer of lawyers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A duck walks into a bar and orders a pint of lager and a ham sandwich

Barman: You’re a duck and you can talk?!

Duck: Quite observant I see, Don’t worry I can pay.

Barman: I’m terribly sorry if I offended you, might I ask, what brings you to a bar like this?

Duck: If you must know, I work on the construction site across the road, if you don’t mind ...

Three men stop for lunch

Three men stop for lunch on a construction site while working on the 10th floor. The first one, Chang from China says "I am so bored with what I have been having for lunch. If I have noodles again for lunch, I am going to jump off the building" And he opens his lunch to find noodles, and promptly ju...

Guardian Angel

A man was walking by a construction site when he heard a woman yell "STOP!!!" The man stopped abruptly, and seconds later a brick fell and landed in his path. He looked around but saw no trace of the woman whose voice he heard.


A day or two after that, he was driving to work. In the midst...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men on their lunch break *LONG*

Three men were working together on the 40th floor construction of the Empire State Building.
An American, an Italian, and a Canadian.

A loud horn is heard signifying lunch, and all three men sat together, on the edge, their feet dangling a hundreds of feet in the air.

The American o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black guy, a white guy, and a Chinese guy...

Get a job on a construction site.
One day the foreman has to keep an early appointment, so he leaves the black guy and the white guy in charge of building, and leaves the Chinese guy in charge of supplies.
Hours later, the foreman returns to find the black and white guys standing around, and...

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer and a sandwich

The bartender says "wow, you don't see that every day! Man, what's your story?"

Th duck says "I'm a welder at the construction site across the street. I'll be here for a few months while we finish the building," and picks up his newspaper and starts reading. The bartender obviously wants to c...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny spends the day watching a house being built...

"Why Johnny, where were you all afternoon?" his mother asks.

"I've been watching them work on the new house getting built down the street. I'm learning all about being a carpenter!"

"Oh really?" she asks, amused. "What kind of wood are they building it out of?"

"Why,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A duck goes into a bar, approaches the counter, and orders a sandwich

He says to the bartender 'listen, I'm a bricklayer on the construction site nearby, the works will last for some time and I'll be coming here every day around lunchtime for a sandwich , so think about some discount or something?

The bartender, shocked as he has never encountered a talking duc...

Paddy's first day on the job

A bunch of Englishmen see that it's an Irishman's first day on a construction site. Deciding to mess with him, they go "Hey, Paddy, since it's your first day, we want to know if you know your stuff. What's the difference between a joist and a girder?"

Paddy thinks for a moment before sayi...

What's the difference between a girder and a joist?

it's my cake day, so here's my favorite joke.

An Irishman is out of work and decides to go to a construction site and apply. The foreman is an older English fellow who doesn't care for Irishmen, thinks they're drunks and dumb and unreliable. But he knows he can't just come out and say that.<...

German lady visits a psychic.

A german woman sees a newspaper ad for psychic readings. She decides to give it a shot.

*"This week you will kill millions upon millions of people."*, the psychic tells the woman.

*"What a bunch of kuhscheiße"*, thinks the woman, as she leaves.

She's walking by a construction si...

There were three construction workers...

...a Mexican, a British man, and a Blonde. Everyday they ate their lunch breaks together, and everyday they each had the same lunch as the day before. The Mexican always had two tacos, the British man always had a fish sandwich, and the blonde man always had a PB&J. One day, they all were having...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The 3 Construction Workers (really old joke, but one of my favorites when I was little)

(Sorry if this has been posted before, I only subscribed recently and haven't seen this one yet)

There are three construction workers: Joe, Bob, and Frank. One day they are sitting on an I-beam high above their construction site. It is lunch hour and the three have their lunchboxes, ready to ...

Penguin at the bar

A guy walks into a pub. He orders a pint at the bar and looks around the place. Suddenly, he noticed a penguin in a corner, reading a newspaper. The penguin then downs a pint next to him and leaves. The guy's so shocked he couldn't do anything. He runs to the bartender and goes:-What the hell was th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 Canadian guys discover an old oil lamp...

3 Canadian guys - One Newfie, One Quebecois, and one from Ontario are working together on a construction site. While digging they discover an old oil lamp, which, when picked up immediately belches forth a smoky, strange looking individual they know must be a genie.

"Thank you for freeing me,...

Lunch

First time posting. Sorry for the bad grammar and punctuation.

There were three construction workers an English and Indian and a Chinese. Everyday at 12 o'clock they'd sit down and eat their lunch. They'd been working at this construction site for a month and everyday they would have the same...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Construction signals

so there was this man working on a construction site on the third floor. during his work he realized he needed a handsaw, but there was nowhere to be found, then he looks down. seeing a fellow co-worker on the 1st floor, so the man on the third floor screams and yells at the guy, now the guy can see...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Welding Mask

It's Johnny's tenth birthday, so his mother gives him five bucks to go to the candy store down the street to buy whatever he wants. During his walk he goes through a construction site and sees a welding mask on the ground that he thinks is cool so he decides to pick it up and put it on.

As he...

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman...

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were all builders sitting at the top of their current construction site for lunch. The Englishman opened his sandwich and turned to the others to say:
"Bloody hell I've got Ham and Cheese again!"
The Irishman looks at his sandwich and says: "Aye, I h...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.