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Be Clever Jokes

Why Bilbo had to be Male

Fun fact: Bilbo Baggins had to be a male in order for the plot of The Hobbit to work. If he was instead female, everything would have fallen apart in the goblin cave. Bilbo would have gone off wandering around in the dark and dreary caverns, found the ring, and seen Gollum fishing like in the origin...

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My manly password

My wife and I were trying to set up a new password for our computer.

Trying to be clever, I put "Mypenis" and my wife fell to the ground laughing hysterically because on the screen it said:

**"Error. Not long enough."**

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Just seen a lad who I used to go to school with years ago

and we ended up having a bit of a catch up and he revealed he's getting wed soon and it's an arranged marriage that his parents have sorted out for him.

So I was asking about the ins and outs of what goes on and what the bride is like etc.. and he basically tells me that him and his parents h...

A little girl tells her dad she wishes she had a sister

In an attempt to be clever, her dad explains, "You do, it's just you don't see her. Every time you come in the front door: she leaves out the back door.". The little girl replies, "ohhhh, just like my other daddy!"

Three men and three women sit across from one another at a table...

Three men on one side, and three women on the other.
One man decides to be clever, and says to the woman in front of him, "Pass the honey, honey!" with a wink.
The second man thinks this is pretty clever. So, soon after, the second man says to the woman in front of him, "Pass the sugar, sugar!...

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Made this one up in health class today

Suzy gets invited to go to her first high-school party with alcohol. Her mother is no fool and understands how teenagers are, so she sits Suzy down and gives her the talk "Now Suzy. it is normal for girls and boys your age to begin to have sex. It is natural and nothing to be ashamed of , BUT if you...

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The Tale Of Hare & Tortoise

Once there was a hare and a tortoise. Hare used to make fun of the tortoise about his speed. After getting fed up of all the remarks of hare, tortoise proposed a bet to race to finally conclude who is faster. Hare being confident in himself agreed to the bet. They both started the race from the agre...

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