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Arms Length Jokes

I knew a man who didn’t trust his hands

He had to keep them at arms length

A friend of mine was given a new iwatch but he was suspicious someone was using it to spy on him.

Ever cautious he told me he likes to keep it at arms length.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A thalidomide victim has been badly injured by a firework...

He followed the instructions precisely - "Light fuse and hold at arms length".

Nearly blew his fucking head off!

A Finnish Soldier...

In the winter war in 1945 is getting in line for a rifle. The man behind the counter says "sorry, the guy in front of you got the last one. Here, take this hockey stick, and if you see a Russian, point it at him and yell BANG!" The Finn finds this ridiculous but takes it, thinking he'll just fix a b...

Three young friends, seeking a fortune, adventure together to Egypt where a new pyramid has been discovered

Upon arriving at the pyramid, they are immediately told to leave as the site has already been excavated. The friends, not willing to concede, look for a different way in and find an entrance never before used.

It is through this entrance that they find a secret passage way, one that is made...

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