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Ventriloquist Dummy Jokes

My uncle was a ventriloquist dummy. He died drinking furniture polish.

It was a slow death but a beautiful finish.

Once I forgot to bring my ventriloquist dummy to a show and I had use a voodoo doll of myself,

It was a pain in the hole.

My ventriloquist dummy said he hates having his life led by someone else.

I said, "Speak for yourself."

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