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Tuna Sandwich Jokes

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Three girls, a blonde, a readhead and a brunette, are having lunch break together...

The brunette opens her lunchbox and sighs:"My husband is so kind, he prepares my lunch every day but... Again a tuna sandwich?"

The readhead opens hers and sighs too:"Crap, tuna sandwich for me too... Again!"

The blonde opens hers and goes:"Guess what? I got the same t...

Three construction workers have lunch together on top of a tall building.

Three construction workers have lunch together on top of a tall building.

The first one opens his lunch box and goes "Another tuna sandwich? I eat tuna sandwich every day. If I have to eat another tuna sandwich I'm going to jump!". The second one opens his lunch box and also goes "Man, anoth...

A hungry man stops at a small restaurant along the road...

to buy something to eat. Behind the bar is a very attractive young girl smiling at him. Next to her is a board that reads:

* Tuna Sandwich $8
* Beef Sandwich $9
* Turkey Sandwich $8.5
* Handjob $5

After having read the board, the man asks the beautiful girl "Hey gorgeous are y...

A Tuna Sandwich Walks Into A Bar

The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve food here"

The oldest joke I know. Three men are working on a building site.

Every day, they sit down to eat their lunch together at the top of the building.

The first man opens his lunchbox to reveal a ham sandwich.

“By god” the man exclaims, “I hate ham sandwiches. I’ve been working in construction for twenty years and every day, despite me telling her how ...

A cat walks into a bar….

A cat walks into a bar and says:

„I‘d like a tuna sandwich and a … beer“.

The bartender asks: „Why the small pause?“

Why do the French never eat tuna sandwiches?

Because bread is pain and fish is poisson

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three women are working construction. A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette.

The three of them are sitting down to have lunch, and the redhead opens her lunch to find she has the same tuna sandwich she always gets. She exclaims “I swear, if I have to eat a tuna sandwich for lunch again, I’m going to jump off this building and kill myself.”

The brunette opens her lunc...

My favorite Lent joke (as told to me by an Episcopal reverend)

A Protestant moves into a Catholic neighborhood. It's a pretty open-minded and welcoming community, and everyone gets along great.

The first time an issue presents itself is when Lent rolls around. During Lent, the Catholics in the neighborhood all swear off red meat. Every day at lunch, h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jesus is bored in heaven and decides to take a vacation to Earth

He thinks hitchhiking could be fun, so he disguises himself as an average looking American and flies down from heaven onto a highway in Nebraska. He sticks his thumb out and after a little while, an 18-wheeler pulls over to offer a ride. He climbs in the cab, tells the driver he's headed west and ...

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman...

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all builders working on a bridge. The Englishman opens his lunch-box and says, "If I get one more tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this bridge." The Scotsman opens his lunch box and says, "If I get one more ham sandwich, I'm going to jump off this b...

A blonde, brunette, and red-head are sitting on a bridge ...

... eating lunch. The brunette opens up her lunch bag and says: "ugh, if I get a tuna sandwich again tomorrow, I'm gonna jump off this bridge". The red-head open up her lunch bag and says: "ugh, if I get a tuna sandwich again tomorrow, I'm gonna jump off this bridge". The blonde opens up her lunch b...

A guy at work takes out his lunchbag and looks inside

He sighs and says "a tuna sandwich again? I'm getting tired of this."

The next day during the lunch break he takes out his lunch bag, opens it, looks inside and again he sighs, saying "every single day for lunch, a tuna sandwich. I really can't take it anymore."

His friend says to him ...

Long... Three builders...

Three builders are working on top of a tall building and decide to break for lunch. First guy opens his lunchbox and sees a ham and cheese sandwich. "I'm sick and tired of ham and cheese sandwiches, that's two weeks in a row now with nothing but ham and cheese sandwiches, if I get this tomorrow I'm ...

Food

Weird: People in my office have started naming the food in the company fridge. Today I ate a tuna sandwich named Kevin.

Who the hell names food anyway?

I recently started a new job and soon realized that some crazy fool was giving names to all of the food in the break room refrigerator.

Today I had a tuna sandwich named 'Bob'.

Three workers were having lunch on a bridge

They were each discussing what they had for lunch. Sam had a ham and cheese sandwich: “Man if my wife packs ham and cheese one more time this week I am jumping off this bridge. Tony had roast beef: “Me too man, I’m sick of roast beef. If I get this one more time this month I’m jumping off.” Carl had...

A Subway sandwich maker has a very eccentric regular customer.

The eccentric customer always orders a tuna sandwich, but heavily modified, made with an extra cup of mayo, smothered in chili peppers, red peppers, onions, and pickles, then toasted until it's burnt. It looks and smells disgusting and the worker dreads it when he sees that customer come in.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 young boys are eating lunch on a bridge

The first one, who is French, says "If I find another baloney sandwich in my lunch tomorrow, I'm jumping off of this bridge!"

The second one, who is Irish, says "If I find another turkey sandwich in my lunch tomorrow, I'm jumping off of this bridge!"

The third one, who is Scottish, say...

A blond, a redhead, and a brunette are at school one day eating lunch

The blond says to her friends, "If I have another turkey sandwich for lunch, I'm going to kill myself!" The redhead, knowing how she feels says, "if I get a ham sandwich for lunch one more time, then I'm going to kill myself!" The brunette chimes in and says, "you know, if I get another stupid tuna ...

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman...

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were all builders sitting at the top of their current construction site for lunch. The Englishman opened his sandwich and turned to the others to say:
"Bloody hell I've got Ham and Cheese again!"
The Irishman looks at his sandwich and says: "Aye, I h...

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