The Cure Jokes - 25 Hilarious The Cure Jokes

Trump couldn't find the cure for the Coronavirus...

But the Coronavirus may have found the cure for Trump.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Anyone know the cure for sex addiction?

I tried fucking everything

I discovered the cure for blindness.

Vitamin See

I found the cure for blindness!

It was a real eye opener

Good News! We’ve discovered the cure for cancer!

Bad news: It’s eugenics.

The cure for my depression is right around the corner...

Yep here comes the train now.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Cure

Gus was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself."

That same day Gus went to the store an...

I've heard that I'm the cure to Covid.

Lucky for you it's a suppository.

Did u hear the joke about the cure for covid19?

It's a riot

I'm no expert on covid-19 but I do know the cure

They are an amazing band from the 80s.

The Cure for the Common Cold

It's called "The Whiskey and a Hat Trick"

All you need is a bottle of whiskey and a hat.

First, sit on your bed. Place the hat at the foot of the bed. Proceed to drink whiskey until you see two hats, then go to sleep.

If you do this your cold will be gone in just 7 days.

...

Scientists have just found the cure to COVID-19

They call it cyanide.

*It also cures all other diseases.*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Cure for Hiccups

A man walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist if he has anything to cure hiccups. The pharmacist says he does! So the pharmacist pulls out a glass and a pitcher of water. Then he starts filling the glass. He poured very slowly, and as the last little bit entered the cup, he let out a very loud...

I've just discovered the cure to Social Anxiety!

Social Security.

Doctor: You have a disease, but we can treat it. Patient: What's the cure?

Doctor: It's an 80s rock band fronted by Robert Smith. But let's try to stay focused.

the cure for stealing

There is a pastor in a small town who is displeased to discover that someone has stolen his bicycle. It is a small town so he does not own a car and uses his bike to get everywhere. But more upsetting is the fact that he knows everyone in town, since they are all members of his congregation, and he ...

I found the cure for imposter syndrome

No I didn't. I'm a fraud.

The doctor said to me, “Your brain seems to have deleted all information about 80's pop music!” I gasped, “Yikes! What’s The Cure?!”

He yowled, “Oh my God! It’s worse than I thought!”

Took awhile for the Trump administration to finally register and patent the cure for COVID-19 under...

ISO-LATE

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My doctor told me that I have very shitty knees. When I asked for the cure....

He told me I should really pull my pants down when I take a poop

There’s a virus that makes us forget 80s music. It may be spreading.

No one knows the Cure

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once there lived a horny man (NSFW)

There was once a horny man, who always wanted to suck the Queen's tits. He kept fantasizing, but he knew that he could never do it. He got a friend who was in the King's Palace, so he decided to ask him for help. The Friend agreed to help the horny man to fulfill his dream, but the horny man should ...

Guys, I think I found the Cure to Aids!

It requires having a Magic Johnson.

Say what you will, but today's young professionals are the ones that will eventually find the cure for cancer. I can see the headlines now:

"Millennials Killed Cancer"

When my mom asked me to sponsor her Run for The Cure, I was surprised.

I'd thought The Cure had done quite well for themselves.

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