Superbowl party!? Or superb Owl party?!

As a fun intellectual alternative to the sports balls.

Genghis Khan once had the hands of an entire village of superb bowmen maimed so their skills could never be used against him. Similarly, he crippled a conquered town of excellent sprinters

For the town, it was a crushing de feet

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Italian Casanova

An Italian was driving his sports car along the Amalfi coast when he saw a beautiful girl hitchhiking. He stopped the car and offered the girl a ride. He went in ‘Casanova-mode’ and leaned over the pull the girl close. She didn’t object so he took it a step further. He drove to his house and took th...

It is early January of 1793. The commotion outside of the Castle of Versailles is growing louder by the minute. Louis XVI, however, is not bothered, as he is getting his new suit matched, pleated and frilled in his chambers by his favorite tailor.

"Ah yes, Poilon, superb work with the gold thread on my boot leather as per usual. And now: the silk pants with Morocco pearls."

"Y-your Majesty... I think they're breaking down the front wall."

"Nonsense! Clothe me or I shall have you beheaded!"

"Absolutely, your majesty! There...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It’s a little boy’s seventh birthday.

For his birthday, his parents buy him a really superb cowboy outfit. I mean, it’s got everything: the boots, the spurs, the tiny plastic revolvers. The boy is thrilled; he doesn’t take the outfit off all day.

That evening, the little boy’s parents take him out to an ice cream parlor for a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend asked why I never used condoms

I said, "My pull out game is superb and condoms are expensive. You gotta keep a tight budget when you have 14 kids."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An out of work pianist with Tourette's Syndrome was strolling around the streets and bars of Soho one sunny afternoon....

An out of work pianist with Tourette's Syndrome was strolling around the streets and bars of Soho one sunny afternoon.

Walking down Dean Street he sees a lounge bar with a sign in the window: 'Pianist wanted for evening performances'.

"Fucking get in there you cunt!" he says to himself...

An HR manager was knocked down (tragically) by a bus and was killed. Her soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, where St.Peter welcomed her.

“Before you get settled in” he said, “We have a little problem…you see, we’ve never had a HR manager make it this far before and we’re not really sure what to do with you.”

“Oh, I see,” said the woman, “can’t you just let me in?”

“Well, I’d like to,” said St Peter, “But I have higher o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Manager of a company has to make a hard choice:

Lay off Jack or Jane.

They are both superb workers, but the company has run into hard times.

In the meantime, Jane is hard at work but suddenly gets up from her desk to get some water.

The manager decides to use this opportunity to break the bad news to her.

Manager: "Jan...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman applies for work at a construction site.

Her skills and recommendations are superb, so the foreman is ready to offer her the job. "We are kinda rough here. And we use body parts in our "sign language" to get around the noise and distance on the site."

"No problem," she replies, "all part of the job."

Soon, the foreman is on...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Thought this one was odd enough to share

This bloke walks into the poshest restaurant in town and says, "Where's the god damn, mother fucking Manager you cock sucking arse wipe." The waiter is naturally taken aback and replies, "Excuse me, sir, but could you please refrain from using that sort of language in here, I will get the manager as...

Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?

It was a superb_owl.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A bloke walks into an extremely posh restaurant, sits down and waives the waiter over. "I want to see the cock-sucking, mother-fucking boss now," he says.

The waiter is naturally a bit taken aback and replies "Excuse me, sir, would you refrain from using that kind of language in here, I will get the manager as soon as I can."

The manager comes over and the bloke says "Are you the chicken fucking manager of this bastard joint?" "Yes sir, I am", ...

Nice Car!

A guy driving a Yugo pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. The driver of the Yugo rolls down his window and shouts to the driver of the Rolls, "Hey, buddy, that's a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I've got one in my Yugo!"

The driver of Rolls looks over and says simply, "Yes...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One day, a priest decides to take a walk to the pier near his church...

He looks around and finally stops to watch a fisherman load his boat. The fisherman notices, and asks the priest if he would like to join him for a couple of hours. The priest agrees. The fisherman asks if the priest has ever fished before; the priest says no. He baits the hook for him and says, "Gi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was going through a messy divorce and getting screwed by my wife&'s lawyer when I found an old lamp. I rubbed it and a genie appeared.

"Thank you for freeing me" he said. "In return I grant you 3 wishes"

"Oh! this is great," I said. "For my first one I wish I had an inexaustable supply of cash"


Puff! A wallet full of $20 notes appeared. "No matter how much you take out, it will always be full" said the genie....

An American, a Korean, a Chinese, and a Russian walk into a bar...

...they settled into their seats and when they had loosened up after a few drinks they decided to extol the virtues of their homelands.

"American industry is so superb," said the American. "A sports team can decide to move to a different city, and within a year and a half we can build a stat...

I don't care how great owls are

I'm not throwing some stupid party over a superb owl.

I asked my French friend if he watched superbowl...

...he said bowling is not so big in Europe.

My website just crashed from a huge influx of traffic today...

I wonder why so many people are interested in my superb owl, today of all days. I mean, he's really great and all, but he's just an owl.

Bar vs Church

A Bar Opened Opposite a Church!!!

The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.

Days later the bar was struck by lightning & caught fire which destroyed it.

Bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Praye...

Space Bar and the Robot

A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"

The man thought a moment then replied? "A martini please."

The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jack and Sue

The manager of a company has to make a hard choice, whether or fire Jack or Sue. They are both superb workers, but the company has been running into hard times.

The manager decides that whomever drinks from the cooler first will be laid off the following morning.

Sue, who always comes...

I went to the Doctors today for a checkup

He told me that I had one of the best digestive systems he'd ever seen.

So today I'm celebrating superb bowel sunday.

Blonde and The Holy Man

Blonde: "I have heard that you can perform miracles. Can you demonstrate it to me?"

Holy Man: "Sure, why not. Remove your jeans, turn around and then bend down".

Blonde does as asked.

Holy Man: "Now can you feel my finger?"

Blonde: "Yes".

Holy Man: "But see, both m...

A blonde walks into a hair salon.

A blonde woman walks into a hair salon wearing a big pair of headphones. She sits down and the stylist asks her if she would take the headphones off so he can cut her hair. The blonde says "no, sorry, the headphones have to stay".

He replies "Are you sure? I can't really give you a good hair...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Opporknockity, and a short collection of other terrible music jokes

Mr. Opporknockity is a superb piano tuner. He has spent more than 30 years honing his craft and has made quite a reputation for himself.

He got a call from a guy who had just bought a new grand piano and requested Mr. Opporknockity to come and tune it. Mr. Opporknockity spent more than 3 hour...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.