Stoned To Death Jokes - 7 Hilarious Stoned To Death Jokes

The Pharasees brought an adulterous woman before Jesus to be stoned to death.

They had brought her to test Jesus. He turned to them and shouted, "Let ye who is without sin cast the first stone!"
The people gathered around all paused and looked at one another. Then an elderly woman in the back bent down and hoisted the largest rock she could carry over her shoulders. She...

Stop spreading the fake news that women are forced to wear hijabs.

It's their free choice between wearing them or getting stoned to death.

Who had the first recorded OD?

Saint Stephen. He was stoned to death.

What was the ancient punishment for smoking fatal levels of weed?

You would be stoned to death.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

For the Catholics

A woman was taken into adultery and a group of men approached Jesus and said to him, "This woman was taken in adultery and by the law she should be stoned to death. But what say you?"

Jesus thought and said, "I say that he among you who is without sin should throw the first stone."

At ...

Did you hear about the unfaithful hippie?

She was stoned to death.

The Muslim Who Dated An Ape

Did you hear about the Muslim who was caught screwing an ape? He was stoned to death along with his haram bae.

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