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Patrick Stewart Jokes

What's Patrick Stewart's favourite scale of train?

N gauge

I just watched A Christmas Carol with Patrick Stewart.

What he’s doing round my house I don’t know.

I made a clone of Patrick Stewart but something went terribly wrong.

The clone slammed me into a wall and lifted me by the neck. What could I do? I’d been hoisted by my own Picard.

What does Patrick Stewart use to keep the fire going?

Captains log

I learned something really cool today.

When Patrick Stewart was a small boy, he had a third ear growing on his forehead. Apparently it's a very very rare condition. So to make things worse, no matter how many surgeries he had, it always grew back.

So finally his parents go a hold of a surgeon in Manchester, who said that not only ...

What did Patrick Stewart say when he proposed to his wife?

Engage.

What did renowned Little Shop of Horrors fan, Queen Elizabeth, say to Patrick Stewart at his knighting ceremony?

Kneel, Patrick Stewart.

The company that makes the Opera browser have asked Sir Patrick Stewart to redesign their logo

They want him to make its O.

Patrick Stewart is talking about a new Stsr Trek show he will be in. There will be a disease or attack that wipes out all officers of a certain age, leaving Starfleet without any captains. So they bring in retired admirals to captain the ships.

It will be called "Geria-Trek."

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